Which father knew best? Enough about “Murphy...

Which father knew best? Enough about “Murphy Brown.” Let’s move on to “Leave It to Beaver”--or, at least, to our assertion that Ward Cleaver was an accountant who worked for Lumpy’s father, Fred Rutherford.

We relied on two sources, “The Complete Directory to Prime Time Network TV Shows” and “Total Television.” Deep down, we knew it was insufficient research for a topic of this magnitude, but we thought we’d take a chance.

Foolhardy idea. Now, Don Jennett of Redondo Beach has written to dispute that Fred was the boss. He cites “The World According to Beaver,” which says: “Although it’s never definitely stated that Ward is Fred’s superior, Ward does have a corner office while Fred does not.” Plus, this book points out that Fred was often “chasing after Ward’s job. . . .”

Lumpy, can you clear this up?

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At last, a Perot alternative: Just the other day, Matt Groening, the creator of “The Simpsons,” disclosed in The Times that “I’m voting for Clinton but I’d vote for a statue of Bob’s Big Boy over Bush.”

Perhaps, by coincidence, Bob’s Big Boy restaurants announced that it will register voters Saturday from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. at eight of its local eateries. And, the restaurants are holding a mock presidential election in which adults and children can pick from Clinton, Bush or Groening’s choice, Big Boy.

Given some of the rhetoric in this campaign, a more appropriate third candidate might be the old Jack-in-the-Box clown.

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Traveling man: Mayor Bradley will be inducted into the Greater Los Angeles World Trade Assn.’s Hall of Fame on Oct. 29.

Assuming he’s not off on one of his junkets.

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Speaking of getting out of town: Henk Friezer found a piece of graffiti in Highland Park that dates back, we assume, to the L.A. riots. It appears that someone overruled the original author, scrawling in “Yes” over the “No.”

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Dirty diving: Four men entered the Transamerica Building downtown one morning last July and identified themselves as workers. Instead, they proceeded to sky-dive from the roof of the 32-story office tower.

The parachutists’ identities remained a mystery until Sept. 9, when the building’s security guard recognized one of the group on a TV program.

The guard picked out Donald Swayze, 34, of Reseda, who had given his name at the Transamerica as Donald Shayze. Swayze, whose brother is the actor, Patrick, was charged with trespassing Wednesday and faces arraignment next month.

The TV show, by the way, was “Entertainment Tonight,” which we think may inspire a spinoff, “America’s Most Wanted Siblings of Celebrities.”

miscelLAny:

Who says Hollywood is immoral? The Screen Actors Guild occupies the former home of the Hollywood Congregational Church.