‘Irving Berlin’: Minus the Joy, Most of His Music

Who wrote the song “How Do You Do It Mabel, on Twenty Dollars a Week?” Clue: He also wrote “White Christmas” and “God Bless America.” Now you know.

Irving Berlin, who managed to live through about nine-tenths of the century (he died in 1989 at 101), wrote more songs--both the music and the lyrics--than anybody else. He could have hung a sign outside his door that said “hits for all occasions,” because eventually he seemed to cover every human emotion and state of mind.

There were many sad songs, like “All Alone,” but most were pure joy. Thus it’s especially unfortunate that A&E;’s “Irving Berlin: An American Song” suffers from almost pure joylessness. A two-hour “Biography” special, it premieres Sunday night.

At least the show reveals its true colors right off the bat. It opens in 1925 when, according to the documentary, Irving Berlin’s love life was the scandal du jour because he planned to marry Ellin Mackay. She was Catholic and from a snooty family; he was Jewish and the son of Russian immigrants.

From the prominence it gets in the program, you’d think this was the seminal moment in Irving Berlin’s life. The “tabloids” of the time are tsk-tsk’d for dwelling on Berlin’s romance--but that’s exactly what this “Biography” is doing. There’s no reason to begin in 1925 except to try to grab a viewer’s attention with a little sex upfront.

The show never recovers from this stupid blunder. Another problem is the narrator, Harry Smith. A nice man and an able journalist, Smith is no good as a narrator. His flat, bland voice never conveys drama, poignancy, emotion of any kind. He might as well be delivering a graduate thesis in biochemistry.

Of course there are plenty of celebrities that A&E; could have hired to narrate the program--people associated with Berlin and his music. But that would have cost money. Smith is on staff. A&E; is very, very cheap. That may be why this documentary about the most American of all American songwriters features shockingly few of his songs.

That’s right, it’s a musical biography without much music.

What the show does have is a gallery of experts who speak about Berlin, and these include such unimpeachable authorities as daughters Linda Emmet, Elizabeth Peters and Mary Ellin Barrett. They talk with warmth and affection about Daddy, the genius.

Also participating is Bobby Short, the greatest cabaret artist in the world; actor-singer Bernadette Peters, now starring in a hit revival of Berlin’s “Annie Get Your Gun” on Broadway; and that fun couple Helen Gurley Brown and her husband, David, who recall trout fishing at Berlin’s country estate. When these people talk, the show comes to life.

The script is not exactly brimming with insights. Says narrator Smith: “At heart, he was a songwriter, happiest when he was at his piano.” No kidding!

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The producers apparently didn’t want to shell out much money for film clips. Though several Hollywood movies were made with all-Berlin scores, we see only a snippet or two. The amount of material and songs omitted is staggering.

But at least, for all the deficiencies, attention is being paid to Irving Berlin. Hours and hours of cable programming are devoted each week to rock stars, as if American music didn’t begin until the first swivel of an Elvis hip. What a pity if legacies like Berlin’s were allowed to fade away.

When he died, Short wrote an appreciation of Berlin that ended with a twist on lyrics from “Alexander’s Ragtime Band.” Berlin had his detractors, Short wrote, but to most people he was just “the bestest man what am.” He deserves a “Biography” many times better than the one he gets.

* “Irving Berlin: An American Song” can be seen at 5 and 9 p.m. Sunday on A&E.;