All Dressed Up and Nothing to Show

Incessant mist and drizzle that forced U.S. Open tennis officials to postpone more than 100 matches this week turned into a good old-fashioned rainstorm Thursday morning in New York.

The USA network had already televised virtually every minute of tennis played to that point, in tape delay, along with half a dozen classic matches featuring the likes of Jimmy Connors and Pete Sampras.

At one point, commentator Jim Courier quipped, “Coming up next, a first-round match from Cincinnati.”

USA’s Michael Barkann led a group of hardy fans huddling under a grandstand in “spectator practice.” Waving a tennis ball back and forth, he urged them to turn their heads left, then right as if following a long baseline rally.

Sadly, it was among the most compelling bits of live television from the Open in days.

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Add rainy days: Andy Roddick and commentator Tracy Austin teamed to beat twins Mike and Bob Bryan in a televised pingpong match during Thursday’s weather delay. Austin told Roddick to serve first, but he declined.

“You serve,” he said. “Serving is my only weakness.”

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Trivia time: Who was the last unseeded men’s U.S. Open tennis champion?

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Turf war: The Viking-Packer game in Green Bay has to be the most captivating matchup of the first NFL Sunday. When the teams met last December, the game featured numerous cheap shots, a sideline fight, Brett Favre showing his middle finger to Minnesota defensive tackle Chris Hovan and $40,000 in fines.

“I can’t wait to get another crack at Favre,” Hovan told the St. Paul Pioneer Press. “He is the guy I most want.”

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Cool hobby: Asked to name his favorite pastime, Denver Bronco quarterback Jake Plummer said, “Eating Popsicles.”

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Hard knocks: LeBron James, who was an all-state wide receiver in high school, would be wise to approach his basketball career with a football-player mentality, according to a former coach.

“Just because you have a few friends in the league doesn’t mean you’re not going to get knocked on your butt,” Jay Brophy, a former NFL linebacker who coached James in high school, told the Denver Post. “No matter how good you were or how high you were drafted, you’re still a rookie.

“But he’s a tough, resilient kid. The more you knock him down, the more he’s going to get up.”

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Here’s to Phil: The San Francisco Chronicle’s Scott Ostler salutes Phil Mickelson for his attempt to pitch in pro baseball:

“For so long, the rap against golfers has been that they are robots, lack color, conceal whatever personality they have. Lefty is letting his hair down, having fun.

“Besides, there’s history to be made ... he could claim the title of ‘greatest golfer never to win a World Series game.’ ”

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Trivia answer: Andre Agassi in 1990.

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And finally: Jason Giambi, explaining the origins of his many tattoos to Spin magazine: “I’ve got some tribal symbols, a few skulls, there’s a dragon on one of my arms ... you might say I’ve got issues.”

-- John Weyler