THE NBA / MARK HEISLER : Forget Jekyll and Hyde, the Chameleons Are Here

Is this a great country or what? You fly here from Chicago and suddenly everything is different.

Shaquille O’Neal is no longer a no-account, free throw-missing hulk but a symbol of the exuberance of youth. Dennis Rodman is no longer an adored outlaw, striking a blow for individuality, but a lunatic on the loose.

It’s not just home cooking. These days, sports “journalism” is so conditioned by the euphoria that accompanies winning and the despair that attends losing as to be essentially meaningless.

In practice, every player has two stories, happy and sad. When his team wins, everyone trots out the happy story. (Michael Jordan made mistakes but has “matured.” If there were as much maturity as writers and announcers assert, it would be a lot calmer world.)

When Jordan’s team loses, everyone goes the other way. (He has great gifts and privileges but is throwing them away, the ingrate).

The players who are universally admired today were considered head cases five years ago. It’s as if there isn’t a real person in there with good qualities and flaws, neither icon nor clown, winner nor loser.

With that in mind, let’s take a look at this postseason’s fortunate and unfortunate sons:

Jordan--He was once criticized for “not making teammates better,” a la Larry Bird and Magic Johnson. Then he won three titles and was deified. Then he was too old; as recently as midseason Scottie Pippen was supposedly the Bulls’ real MVP. Now Jordan has regained legend status. He’s also back in his who-are-you-going-to-believe, me-or-your-eyes mode, confiding to a reporter that he would take $18 million a year, calling it “pure conjecture” the next day. Look for him to sign a two-year, $40-million deal (owner Jerry Reinsdorf will give him a little more to make it look good), after which Jordan’s honeymoon will end and the season will become a grind again.

Hakeem Olajuwon--Before he led the Houston Rockets to two titles, he was known as a renegotiating pain in the neck. Now he’s a saint, though one on a broken-down team. Insiders say he still loves money and will play until he’s 40, even if he has to chase around for a gig like Robert Parish.

Patrick Ewing--Despite years of gallantry, he proves there’s no percentage in being the best player on a limited team. Knick insiders have long whispered he’s a choker. When Jeff Van Gundy noted, correctly, that Ewing is expected to be another Jordan and no one else can pass that test, either, Marv Albert, the Knick/NBC announcer said Van Gundy was “blurring the issue.” When Albert does Knick games, he’s as tough as Vinny from Queens on WFAN.

John Starks--All heart but vilified in New York, ripped by Albert on the air for his two-for-18 in Game 7 at Houston in 1994. Forgotten is Game 6, when Starks almost single-handedly carried the Knicks to victory. Forgotten, too, is his limping return on an arthroscoped knee for the playoffs. If he hasn’t been the same player since, it may be because he came back too soon.

David Robinson--He’s a lock for the Hall of Fame--unless he keeps making the playoffs. Ran No. 1 and 2 in MVP voting the last two seasons and turned into a pillar of salt both springs. In ‘95, he blamed Rodman. This time, he railed at referee Steve Javie after the Game 6 loss to Utah but also apologized to teammates for letting them down. Problem: Despite an impressive upper body, he’s thin--he has a 32-inch waist--and gets bumped around in slowdown playoff games. Needs to show more mental toughness, rather than congratulating himself on the quality of his life all the time. A year ago when Olajuwon spanked him, Robinson explained blithely it was OK because Olajuwon was a scorer and he wasn’t. There’s nothing wrong with losing, but excuses are lame.

Charles Barkley--He handles his own spin control so adroitly, it’s now accepted truth that he’s a tireless worker. Actually, he’s uncontrollable, gets down when things go bad and lashes out. On the other hand, he’s a great player. The top option for three teams who have fallen from elite status--Rockets, Indiana Pacers and Knicks--he’s hoping for a trade and a last hurrah.

Karl Malone--Talk about grind-it-out guys. He has developed so much as a shooter and passer, people barely notice he’s slowing down, but he’ll soon be 33. Like Barkley, he gets that what-if-you-never-

win-a-title question, but he has had a great career, made a lot of money and married a beauty queen. Important fact: The great majority of mankind makes it through life without a championship. In the end, the biggest difference it makes is not having to hear the question any more.

Phil Jackson--He was in that Pat Riley trap. No matter what he won, people said, “Of course, he has Jordan.” Just named coach of the year, he’s finally getting credit. Unfortunately, he also looks like the stressed-out Riley of the late ‘80s. About to be a free agent, his ploy, voicing interest in the Knicks, who hate him, was transparent. If he thinks that was subtle, he has lost it. A great needler, he was perplexed when Van Gundy came after him (as Riley, another media user, was once perplexed when Jackson came after him). Van Gundy got some final shots in, refusing to shake hands after the series and later congratulating “Michael Jordan and the Bulls.”

Van Gundy--Jackson’s revenge: the Knicks just rehired Van Gundy, who will have to work a miracle with his aging, grumbling roster or become a sacrificial lamb in a season or two.

Rodman--People actually ask if he’s promoting a cause. As far as anyone can tell, he isn’t gay, he just considers gays fellow outcasts. His only real cause is Dennis Rodman. He’s a troubled guy who learned self-promotion at the Madonna/Howard Stern let’s-see-what-we-can-do-to-

shock-Ma-and-Pa-today school.

As a basketball player, Rodman is an absolute genius, the greatest rebounder and defender, pound for pound, who ever lived. Newfound stability will be tested if the Bulls let him go, but Reinsdorf is reportedly nervous about tying himself to Dennis long-term.

O’Neal--OK, he can’t shoot free throws. Aside from that, he’s the game’s great terror weapon, a fine low-post scorer and, at 24, a bring-it-every-game warrior. Despite long discussions about the one thing he doesn’t do, there aren’t many teams that wouldn’t pay him $20 million a year and cut 10 of their players for the salary cap room.

NAMES AND NUMBERS

Another great sucking sound in Dallas: After canning Dick Motta, new Maverick owner Ross Perot Jr. cashiered holdover general manager Norm Sonju for blowing the Larry Brown recruitment. Sonju let word leak into the papers without asking permission to speak to Brown, giving Pacer President Donnie Walsh a chance to raise the tampering bugaboo--punishable by a $5-million fine after the Riley-Miami affair. Walsh called Brown back to Indianapolis from a vacation in Phoenix and Brown promised to stay. However, he also called the Mavericks’ interest “flattering” and “a case of bad timing.” . . . Former Maverick owner Don Carter was known for forgiving his top people--like Sonju--but the new owners, who first put Sonju back in charge of the basketball operation, put him on the street. . . . Lucky Pierre grounded: Pat Williams, the Magic vice-president who represented the team when it won the O’Neal and Penny Hardaway lotteries--the latter with one chance in 256--was barred from festivities this time, even though Orlando would have exercised the Warriors’ pick (as part of the Hardaway-Chris Webber trade) if it had been in the top three. “We told them we’d be happy to send someone there, but they said not to bother,” said Magic General Manager John Gabriel. “They said they’ll have some kind of a hookup to stay in touch with us.” . . . Hopeful of another SuperSonic bustout and the termination of George Karl, the Charlotte Hornets settled for San Antonio assistant Dave Cowens to replace Allan Bristow. Karl turned around a Seattle franchise that was stuck at .500 for three seasons before his arrival. Cowens, a better player but a less-experienced coach, is looking at a similar challenge.

The Bulls refused to let teams talk with assistant Jim Cleamons. General Manager Jerry Krause said Cleamons can’t be distracted from his present job. . . . One chair that isn’t opening up (just yet): Denver Nugget boss Charlie Lyons said Bernie Bickerstaff, who assembled the team, returned as coach to rally it last season and led it to a flop this season, can remain. “We were a genius when he went 20-12 [last season],” Lyons said. “I got Bernie into this, so it would be inappropriate to say ‘You’re out’ unless he wants out. Since he is not one to shy from adversity, he asked to coach again and I said, ‘Great.’ ”. . . The Barkley sweepstakes: The Knicks have little to offer but 32-year-old Charles Oakley and problem-child Anthony Mason. The Rockets have little to offer but disappointing Robert Horry. The Pacers, however, have a deep roster and surplus big men. . . . Big question: Barkley and Brown? Sounds like Brown and George McGinnis in Denver in 1978. Brown was for the deal that sent Bobby Jones to the 76ers for McGinnis, but they fought at the first practice, with McGinnis challenging Brown to trade him and Brown saying he would. Cooler heads prevailed--for about three months until Brown resigned.