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A Baseball Promotion That’s on the Bald

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Piece-loving baseball fans, take note: It’s a happening for the hairless. The Mahoning Valley Scrappers of Niles, Ohio, the Class-A affiliate of the Cleveland Indians, this evening will present “Jim Traficant Night,” with hairpiece wearers and sons of truck drivers admitted free.

Traficant, a former Ohio congressman serving an eight-year prison sentence for bribery and racketeering, often calls himself “the son of a truck driver” but is better known for his gravity-defying hairstyle. It caused much speculation on whether it was real or a rug--until he had to doff it for booking.

“Former Congressman Traficant played a vital role in attracting the franchise to the Mahoning Valley,” General Manager Andy Milovich said. “We felt a Jim Traficant Night would show our sincere gratitude for his efforts.”

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Trivia time: Who is the only player whose jersey number has been retired by the Washington Redskins? Hint: The team has not retired the numbers of any of their three Super Bowl most valuable players.

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Oh for two: Sunday’s brilliant pitching performances by Tim Wakefield of the Boston Red Sox and Steve Sparks of the Detroit Tigers reminded Tom FitzGerald of the San Francisco Chronicle of an old quote by former hitting coach Charlie Lau.

“There are two theories on hitting the knuckleball,” Lau said. “Unfortunately, neither of them work.”

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Not the end of the world: Regarding the Chicago Bears’ complaints about having to play their home games at the University of Illinois in Champaign this season while Soldier Field is renovated, it should be noted that the Tennessee Titans went 6-2 in the Liberty Bowl in Memphis in 1997 while waiting for a new stadium to be built in Nashville.

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J-Load: Regrading Kentucky quarterback Jared Lorenzen, who weighs about 290 pounds, teammate Derek Abney told the Memphis Commercial Appeal: “He stepped on my foot one time in a drill. I thought he broke it.”

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Twenty-five years ago: On this day in 1977, Lanny Wadkins won the 59th PGA Championship in a dramatic three-hole sudden-death playoff with Gene Littler at Pebble Beach, the first sudden-death playoff in a major championship.

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Amnesty international: Tim Kawakami of the San Jose Mercury News, on threats by owner Mark Cuban of the Dallas Mavericks to keep his players out of the World Championships: “So if Dirk Nowitzki and Michael Finley play anyway, would you consider them Cuban defectors?”

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Trivia answer: Sammy Baugh, who wore No. 33.

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And finally: Dan Le Batard of the Miami Herald, on the decision by major league baseball players Monday to postpone setting a strike date:

“Finally, a hiccup’s worth of positive news in the sport that keeps asking its fans to choose between the insanely greedy steroid freaks and the billionaire liars with creative accountants.

“Trying to pick a side between baseball’s players and owners is like choosing between *NSYNC (can’t the Russians shoot them all into outer space?) and the Greasy, Balding, Rehabbing Backstreet Boys--no matter which way you lean, you are going to find yourself closer to something evil.”

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