The Times’ Top 25

Booking manager at “Puns, Pizza and Polls” instructs opening act Rankman to keep introduction short to make way for dancing penguins, so give me an “A” for Alabama moving up one spot, a “B” for Boise State proving it belongs and a “C” for Cincinnati. OK, my time’s up, you’ve been great.

Rk.; TEAM; Comment (Last week’s ranking)

1

TEXAS

4-0

During bye, TD allowed to UTEP will be studied as “teachable moment.” (1)

2

FLORIDA

4-0

Conan O’Brien, Tebow can’t remember exchanging get-well texts. (2)

3

BOISE STATE

4-0

Lawyer suggests “tanking” if BCS antitrust lawsuit is to stick. (8)

4

LOUISIANA

STATE 4-0

Reputation and gumbo get you only so far before Florida comes to town. (6)

5

CINCINNATI

4-0

Held football clinic this week for kids and several Cincinnati Bengals. (16)

6

TEXAS

CHRISTIAN 3-0

Halftime show for SMU includes band crossing “t” in Death Penalty. (13)

7

HOUSTON

3-0

Fans of ranked team storm home field after win over unranked team. (14)

8

OREGON

3-1

New goal: become nation’s “best team after Thursday before Labor Day.” (NR)

9

ALABAMA

4-0

Rankfucious says: “Patience, poll crawlers, your time will come.” (10)

10

VIRGINIA TECH

3-1

After cupcakes Alabama, Nebraska, Miami, Hokies get tested at Duke. (17)

11

USC

3-1

No joke here: Rankman wishes Stafon Johnson a speedy recovery. (12)

12

OHIO STATE

3-1

Coping with strange feeling of being the second-best team in Ohio. (9)

13

OKLAHOMA

2-1

Will start either star QB against Miami or last year’s Heisman winner. (11)

14

BRIGHAM

YOUNG 3-1

The “B” in BYU last weekend stood for “bounce back.” (19)

15

OKLAHOMA

STATE 3-1

Off week gives Pickens time to spray- paint locker in 24-carat gold. (15)

16

IOWA

4-0

Defense high in polyunsaturated fats. (NR)

17

MIAMI

2-1

Next time Rankman will check weather report before anointing an offense. (3)

18

PENN STATE

3-1

Iowa is becoming to Joe Paterno what Miami already is to Bobby Bowden. (4)

19

MISSISSIPPI

2-1

David Bowie leaves weird voice mail, “Rebel, Rebel, your face is a mess.” (5)

20

CALIFORNIA

3-1

Free speech thrives in Berkeley and you should hear what they’re saying. (7)

21

GEORGIA

3-1

Bulldogs are 2-2 if A.J. Green misses the team bus for Arizona State. (21)

22

MICHIGAN

4-0

Season no longer hinges on a winged helmet and a prayer. (22)

23

UCLA

3-0

Neuheisel wants team photo taken “NOW!” with Pac-10 standings. (23)

24

KANSAS

4-0

Gripping Big 12 North race features six schools tied at 0-0. (24)

25

NEBRASKA

3-1

Found: 11 missing black shirts. D has allowed 28 points in four games. (NR)

Dropped out: Washington (25), North Carolina (20), Florida State (18).

Moved in: Oregon, Iowa, Nebraska