‘Only Alzheimer’s Disease’
Labor began with my second child, while talking to my mother on the telephone, suddenly my water ruptured. When my husband and I arrived at the hospital, there was Mom! She beat us to the delivery room! Mom was always there for me. My best friend, adviser, confidante.
On July 14 I was there for the birth of my granddaughter. Joy, then a painful sadness, Sarah’s great grandmother would never know her. Mom is in a nursing home, in the last stages of Alzheimer’s disease.
In a civilized society we are indoctrinated into expecting acceptable social behavior from parents, children, etc., to acknowledge us, communicate, groom oneself, eat with appropriate utensils and handle one’s own basic personal hygiene needs.
What the dichotomy, my new granddaughter and Mom (their behaviors not much different). Family and friends stand in line to welcome Sarah to the world, no one comes to see my Mama, as she is about to exit.
Alzheimer’s disease has opened me up to a great learning experience. In its earlier stages, I was angry and resented Mom, who was unable to reciprocate our visits. I am now thankful to still have her here, to bring her milk shakes that I spoon-feed her. I speak to her and tell her how she is loved. I hold her in my arms and kiss her face and together we sometimes cry.
Alzheimer’s may ravage the mind and family. Eventually it will also take her life. Her greatest gift to me is being loved by her, that is enduring.
SUSAN GRAHAM-HOFFMAN
Burbank
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