to Share Holiday Joy With the Homeless
Seeing the down and out on affluent Southern California streets is especially haunting at this time of year, when contrasts between the haves and have-nots just can’t be comfortably ignored. Holiday giving to those less fortunate is an American tradition, and, although almost all of us want to help, many of us are unsure about how to give effectively.
Jill Halverson, director of the Downtown Women’s Center on Skid Row, (213) 680-0600, says you can do the maximum good by working with existing facilities and agencies.
“Contact one of the places in your neighborhood that works with poor and hungry and homeless people, places like the local Y, or your own church or synagogue. Another wonderful resource is the Los Angeles County Information Line ((213) 686-0950; multilingual). It’s a 24-hour (information and referral) line that has the names, addresses and telephone numbers of all the services, and their list is always kept current.
“Also, people can call the City Department of Social Services ((213) 485-5003), which oversees the fund raising for all the charitable groups in the city of Los Angeles.”
Halverson explains that haphazard giving without using an agency can sometimes do more harm than good. “Well-meaning people come downtown and pass out money on the street every Christmas, and as a result someone is always hurt. It’s so demeaning to have a whole group of poor people fighting over money, money that isn’t always used appropriately, incidentally. It would be far better to ask an agency for some guidance on how to distribute cash.”
There are also several groups that come to Skid Row to serve meals in parking lots, tending to set up their giveaways at the same time that food is being served locally. The result is that perishable food is wasted, which is certainly not in the best interest of the hungry, she says.
Others come down and dump clothing on street corners, a common occurrence that brings chaos to the street and havoc to all those who work there.
“People fight over the clothes and then wind up throwing half of them away. The best thing is to take that clothing to an agency where it will be distributed in a much more dignified and respectful way for everyone concerned,” Halverson suggests. “Whatever you want to give will be maximized by going through the proper channels.”
A Sense of Dignity
Protecting the dignity of the poor is a sore issue with those who work closely with them. Some clothing donated is so stained that it’s more insult than gesture of good will. Dirty clothes, broken toys and spoiled foods are constantly being “donated,” and bring more grief than anything else to people whose spirit is already injured.
Halverson says: “I think if we can ask people to think about what they would like to receive and how they would like to receive it, if they were in that other person’s shoes, it could be an enormous help this year.
“When people call to ask what we need at the center, I always try to suggest a broad spectrum of things ranging from those that cost nothing to those that cost something, depending on their financial ability.”
Prized items are often those that are the most practical. Halverson points out that blankets are always very useful, and it is nice to know that your gift is keeping somebody warm when the nights get cold.
Warm socks and underwear are also at the top of the always-needed list. Clean underwear is the first thing people want after they’ve had a chance to clean up at a shelter. Socks are particularly welcome because most of the homeless wear secondhand shoes that don’t fit very well, she says, and a few pairs of socks can help to diminish blisters.
Other good choices are towels, washcloths, soap, deodorant, razors, shaving cream, first-aid supplies, combs, brushes, nail polish and makeup--given in quantities to fit your pocketbook.
“Most women have cupboards full of those free samples given out as favors or as a gift-with-purchase,” Halverson says. “These little jars and bottles of cosmetics and cologne make great stocking-stuffers. They don’t have to fit anybody, and they’re such a treat for the recipients because they’re that little something extra beyond survival.”
The Gift of Time
One of the most appreciated gifts is your time, whether it’s an hour or two or a full day’s work. That kind of personal involvement is very rewarding, Halverson observes, and often you get back more than you give.
“We can use any kind of expertise you have to offer down here, from secretarial and office skills to the more specialized skills of lawyers and doctors,” Halverson says. “Everyone is welcome. We can use help with such things as sorting and distributing donations, or preparing and serving food. And those who want to work at home can make phone calls or help with the books and correspondence. Compassion is acceptable to us on any terms.”
Francis Mc Hugh is operations manager at the Midnight Mission in downtown Los Angeles (213-624-9258). He is one of three salaried people who do not live at the mission, but all other workers, some of whom are paid, have come to the mission for help at one time or another.
“We’re supported strictly by contributions,” he says, “and when you give a dollar to the mission it remains in the mission. The mission is run by a board of directors who serve without pay.”
Overnight Accommodations
The Midnight Mission is a hostel, with room for 140 people to stay overnight. It offers facilities for those just in off the streets to shower, shave and get a clean change of clothing.
“For instance, just today an employment office counselor brought in a young man who was about to go out on a job interview. We provided him with a haircut, shower, and decent clothes so he’d look presentable,” Mc Hugh explained.
He says that the main focus of the mission, however, is feeding people--more than 500 each meal.
“So the kind of help we mostly need is financial,” he says. “I know it may sound crass, but, when you’re feeding people on a such a large scale, donations of food are just given away, because we have to plan and buy in bulk.”
As for donations of clothing, that’s fine too. Again, the most-needed items are new underwear and socks, the first things the homeless receive when they come in. And such toilet articles as soap, razors, shaving cream and shampoo are always in demand.
People are welcome to drop in at any time for a tour to see how the mission operates and how donations are used. “It’s one thing to make a contribution and another to walk through and understand where your money is going. Let me emphasize, it’s not a matter of coming in to gawk at the homeless, it’s a matter of understanding what it is we do here and the feeling of gratification that can bring.”
Giving Gracefully
Alice Callaghan is director of Las Familias del Pueblo (213-614-1745), an agency that works with disadvantaged families, and at holiday time the plight of these people requires special handling.
“Our focus is on helping these families maintain some dignity and self-respect in spite of the negative circumstances,” Callaghan says. “It’s a matter of giving gracefully, so that the recipients aren’t made to feel like charity cases.”
Traditionally what the agency does at Christmas is to hold family-oriented events, parties where the women do the cooking and the men pitch in and help out as needed. They try to create a setting where people are able to do things for their own children.
“We strive throughout the year to accomplish the right atmosphere over the holidays,” Callaghan says. “For example, our Bingo games, which our families play for free. We have games twice a week year-round, and then play every day after Thanksgiving, so that the people here have a chance to accumulate gifts for their children and other family members. Bingo is an excellent way to distribute things because it doesn’t feel like a handout to the poor. They feel that they won the prizes on their own.”
Each November Las Familias sets up a little store on the premises to display donations so that families can shop for a gift for their children with their Bingo winnings. They’re also provided with wrapping materials to do their own packages.
These gifts should be realistic, the kinds of things that parents will be able to duplicate when they’re on their own again. People want so much to be helpful at Christmas and donate expensive gifts, Callaghan says, gifts that can only bring heartache in the long run because they set up expectations that are bound to lead to disappointment.
“Instead we’d appreciate gifts that are worth $5 or less. Things like crayons and coloring books, pencil sets and notebooks, games, puzzles, comb-and-brush sets, cosmetics, wallets, inexpensive items of clothing. You can buy them in large quantities or small--whatever your budget allows, as long as the gifts are inexpensive and practical. And if you could remember us at other, leaner times of the year, too, say from April until fall when we get practically nothing, it would be very helpful.”
Delivering Donations
One of the most difficult problems that comes up at the agency every year is that many families want to deliver their donations themselves, taking their children along to personally present the food baskets and gifts. Callaghan says that although it is a good impulse to try to sensitize your children to poverty, it can be very painful and embarrassing to the poor.
“I know this is a controversial issue and some people get really angry about it, but I don’t believe you should try to do it personally,” she advises. “This is one time the personal touch can be very damaging, harming the very people you want to help. It’s the cohesion of the disadvantaged family that’s important, and that’s what we want to protect. We hope that people can leave here with at least as much dignity as they came in with.”
There are area coalitions throughout Southern California that provide services for the homeless, according to Maurine Kornfeld, chairman of the Countywide Coalition on the Homeless, 646 S. Los Angeles St., Los Angeles 90014.
Among the areas are Hollywood, Long Beach, Oxnard/Ventura, Pasadena, San Fernando Valley, West Los Angeles and Whittier.
“These local coalitions are very effective,” Kornfeld says, “because they understand the problems of their own communities and know the resources that are available locally.”
The Countywide Coalition meets monthly at United Way, 621 S. Virgil Ave., Los Angeles. For information about local coalitions, telephone (213) 625-2501.
Giving Guidelines
Following are some suggestions that summarize the advice of those who work with the homeless:
--Do try to give what you’d like to receive.
--Don’t haphazardly give food, clothing and money. It can do more harm than good.
--Do work with existing agencies. They have the experience to use your donations most effectively.
--Don’t try to do it personally, taking your children to see poverty firsthand. It’s very demeaning to the poor.
--Do give practical, realistic gifts that will make sense to the homeless.
--Don’t give discards such as soiled clothing or broken toys. They are more of an insult than a gift.
--Do give gracefully. It’s not just what you give but how you give it.
--Do try to remember the homeless at other, leaner times of the year.
