Matched Pairs : ‘Introductions Club’ for Christians Takes Place of Singles Bars

Sue Carpenter, a “born-again” Christian who found Him nine years ago, is now looking for him, the perfect earthly mate. But her options are somewhat limited by her religious beliefs.

“It’s kind of difficult as a Christian to meet other Christian people,” Carpenter said. “I don’t think I’d meet many Christians in a bar.”

For Carpenter and others like her, a Los Angeles dating service called Equally Yoked just may be the answer. About 800 people have joined the “Christian introductions” club at its offices in Studio City and Santa Ana since it began two years ago. There have been 17 marriages in that time, and about a dozen couples are engaged.

Pam Parsons, owner and founder of Equally Yoked, said she started the service because “it’s very hard for Christians to meet someone who will go to church with them and pray with them.”

Smaller Groups

Parsons grew tired of trying to meet people in smaller singles groups organized by individual churches. “People are kind of shy at those things,” she said. “You usually end up sticking around the people you already know.”

She emphasized that Equally Yoked is “basically for committed Christians.” Before giving new members information about prospective dates, Parsons likes to ask them a question: “Have you accepted Jesus Christ as Lord of your life?”

After answering in the affirmative, new members fill out a “profile sheet” listing their interests and hobbies, what kind of people they are, their church and denomination, and such information as whether they smoke or drink. Profile sheets and photographs are arranged in a binder with the photographs on the back of each page to encourage decisions based on personality rather than looks.

New members also prepare a three- to five-minute video discussing their lives, interests and “how they came to know the Lord,” Parsons said.

Prepared Beforehand

Between the videotapes and profile sheets, “you really have quite an insight into the person before you even ask them out,” said Gordon Shira, a Lutheran minister who met his bride-to-be through Equally Yoked.

Shira, who is engaged to marry Gloria Mazella of La Crescenta in September, said the singles club offers “much more than just a blind date.”

Cindy Lightfoot, a member of Equally Yoked since February, said the club has taken some of the uncertainty out of the dating game. “Being a Christian, it’s a plus to go out with someone already knowing that they’re Christian,” she said. “You don’t have to listen to a lot of cussing and sex talk and that kind of stuff.”

Lightfoot, a dental hygienist, said she joined the singles group to “find out what was going on in the Christian world” after moving to Los Angeles from Missouri last August.

“It makes for a nice date, where there’s a lot to talk about--both parties seem interested in each other,” she said. “It seems that men I’ve gone out with have been more interested in conversation rather than just entertainment, which is nice.”

Source of Name

Equally Yoked draws its name from II Corinthians 6:14. The New Testament verse instructs, “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? And what communion hath light with darkness?”

Membership costs $495 a year with discounts for those under 25 or over 50. The club’s advertisements on Christian radio stations attract about 40 new members a month, Parsons said. Each year, about six people join the club, discover it’s not for them and quickly drop out.

Parsons said the club is intended to help people find a mate for life. Occasionally, some people join who are not interested in such a long-term commitment, but she does her best to discourage them.

“Supposedly, everyone has joined Equally Yoked hoping to find that perfect mate to fill that empty void in their lives,” Parsons wrote in a letter to be mailed to the club’s membership. “If you did not join Equally Yoked for this reason, you joined the wrong service.”