Psychologist Tells Grads, ‘Don’t Follow the Money’

The step from receiving a diploma to entering the job market is a big one, and one of the most stressful in anyone’s life.

“It’s show time; it’s really high pressure,” said performance psychologist Robert Kriegel. “Most people think that they’re looking at what they’re going to be doing for the rest of their lives.”

Kriegel gives seminars on college campuses around the country to help students cope with the stresses of college life and what follows. Author of “The C-Zone: Peak Performance Under Pressure,” he emphasizes that ways to handle stress can be taught just like any other subject.

Foremost, Kriegel says, recent graduates should look for a job that they really want to do, rather than look for a job simply because it pays well. Too many people look for financial gain, he says.

“What I have found uniformly is that successful leaders chose their career because they loved it--it was a passion--and not because of the money,” he said. That conclusion has been backed up by several studies, he says, which also have shown that millionaires most often entered their career out of love and not for the money.

‘Do What You Love’

“Don’t follow the money,” Kriegel says. “Do what you love, and the money will follow. Have the courage to chase your dream.”

If people love what they are doing, they are more creative, curious, enthusiastic and energetic, he says.

Besides, Kriegel said, most college graduates will have three or four careers in their lives, so the first one is not necessarily crucial.

Kriegel formerly counseled U.S. Olympic athletes on sports psychology. He said the same techniques used by a gold-medal winner can be used by someone preparing for any high-pressure situation.

“You have to get mentally ready. You have to know how to prepare your mind-set. You can’t be too relaxed or too nervous,” he said.

Kriegel explained what to do about such negative and stress-producing thinking as the “gottas,” “worries” and “can’ts.”

For instance, when you say to yourself that you “have to” do certain things, you try too hard, move too fast, become nervous and make mistakes, he said.

The “worries” are when you have unrealistic fears about the consequences of not getting a certain job.

“You may act like it is life or death,” Kriegel said. “What you need is a ‘reality check.’ What is the worst that could happen? Are you going to die? Is the world going to end?

“Worry is the negative national pastime. It produces a state of inertia. You don’t do anything except watch the horror movie” in your mind.

Before any job interview, students should realize that many things are beyond their control and should only concern themselves with the things they can control, he said.

The Next Step

“You can’t control what someone else is going to do or say or think. What you should do is to take worry to the next step. You can make a worry list, then change it to anticipation. Anticipate every possible thing that can come up, and then you find an answer for everything. You should always anticipate the undesired and the unexpected.”

Visualization is a popular sports tool that can be used by anyone in other situations, he said. Before going to a job interview, rehearse it in your mind in as much detail as possible. Close your eyes and see the office, how you are dressed, how confident you are.

“If I say ‘don’t worry,’ the picture in my mind is worry. If I say ‘victory,’ the picture in my mind is victory,” Kriegel said.

“One of the things I found about winners is that they think differently. They have a slight mental edge. They have the commitment that comes from the heart. They hate to lose, but they’re not afraid to. They’re willing to take risks. They’re in control of themselves,” he said.