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Pills Can Help Those Suffering Headaches During Sex

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Q. I just read the letter from the reader who got intense headaches upon reaching her sexual climax. I had the same problem and my doctor said it was probably psychological. My psychologist sent me to a psychiatrist, who prescribed a pill, an anti-inflammatory medication, to take before having sex. I took no more than three of these pills and have remained headache-free for many months. Tell your reader she is not crazy.

A. Thank you for sharing your experience. You mention a specific drug in your letter, but of course I cannot prescribe, either in this column or anywhere else, not being an M.D. However, there is no reason why women with this problem cannot mention their experience to their own doctors.

Q. I am a 78-year-old playboy. I want to say, from my vantage point, that the husband described in a recent column, the one who brings his wife close to orgasm and then lights up a cigarette, is a selfish pig--and ignorant, too, because there is a much better way to delay his own orgasm.

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A. Not only is he sexually uninformed but he is also a potential arsonist with those cigarettes in bed. You are a nice playboy to take the trouble to write. I hope you are being a playboy with one reliable partner. Even at 78, faithfulness to a reliable partner is safest. When you are 98 you will thank me for telling you so.

Q. I hate to think of losing this wonderful relationship because of a sexual difficulty. My lover (we are in our 30s) has premature ejaculation and cannot satisfy me sexually. He says he will get over this in time and asks me to be patient, but I have been patient a long time now. He has had this problem in past relationships, he concedes. Must I go on in my present state of sexual frustration?

A. I am very much interested in how often women write saying they hate to lose the relationship because of sex. The sex is not the chief thing in their wanting a male companion. Important it may be, but difficulties in the sexual aspect of the relationship are seen only as difficulties to be overcome.

In the main, women don’t walk out just because the sex is not ideal. They hope for and look for improvements in the lovemaking. Your lover is wrong to say he will get over his premature ejaculation in time, if you will be patient. When there is a pattern of premature ejaculation, it does not go away by itself. I suggest that you get hold of my book “Dr. Ruth’s Guide for Married Lovers,” and read the chapter on premature ejaculation.

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