Film Asks, ‘What if Ads Told the Truth?’ Madison Ave. Doesn’t Like It

Suppose you turned on your TV and saw this commercial: “We know we’re not sexy. But being sexy today is not such a great idea with so many new diseases around. Be safe instead of sexy. Buy Volvo. Boxy but good.”

Of course, Volvo’s not running that advertisement. But beginning April 11 this parody-commercial--and several other outlandish, make-believe ads for Jaguar and John Hancock life insurance--will be seen on movie screens nationwide.

The Jaguar commercial promises men who own Jaguars that they will receive sexual favors “from women you hardly know.” And the John Hancock ad notes: “We know you love him, but if he dies, we give you a summer home and two Mercedes-Benzes. Wouldn’t that be nice, too?”

To the burned-out ad executive played by Dudley Moore in the upcoming Paramount Pictures comedy “Crazy People,” such commercials are examples of something few ad executives ever consider creating: honest ads. But before the film has even been released, West Coast advertising executives are generally reacting with outrage.

“The idea that advertising isn’t truthful is a fabricated concept,” said Clifford J. Einstein, president of Dailey & Associates, which creates ads for the California State Lottery. “Advertising is more truthful than the news.”

“This movie might upset people in the advertising business,” said Mitch Markowitz, who wrote the screenplay about an ad executive who is committed to a mental institution by his co-workers for creating truthful ads. “But what some advertisements do is unconscionable.”

Markowitz, who has never worked at an agency, said he is not condemning all advertising. But he comes down hard on certain categories--such as automobiles and liquor. His original script included a whiskey ad that said: “Having tax problems? Get drunk.”

“I wish I hadn’t let them talk me (into) taking that one out of the script,” said Markowitz, who also wrote the hit film “Good Morning, Vietnam.” “Why do most people drink whiskey? To get drunk.”

How will the rest of Madison Avenue react to this film? “I think ad people will love it,” said producer Thomas Barad. “These characters do what we all want to do--tell the truth.”

Not surprising, these “truthful” ads in the film have wildly successful results. And that is not without precedent. One of the first American ad executives to practice truth in advertising on a grand scale was Bill Bernbach, who in the 1960s created the famous Volkswagen ad that flatly stated: “It’s ugly, but it gets you there.”

“Crazy People” is hardly the first film to take a poke at the advertising business. Last year, the British film “How to Get Ahead in Advertising” struck a nerve when it depicted an ad man so obsessed with a pimple medication campaign that he developed a boil on his neck that ultimately took over his body. And in the 1986 film “Nothing in Common,” Tom Hanks played a Chicago advertising whiz kid who realized he was no less a huckster than his dying father--a salesman for a children’s clothing manufacturer.

Although “Crazy People” won’t be released for several months, its basic premise--that most advertising is dotted with deceit--is already hitting some top ad executives where it hurts.

“Most advertising creates its own reality, so in that sense ads do lie,” said Nancy Shalek, president of Shalek Agency, which creates ads for Speedo swimsuits and Teleflora. “That bothers me. But it also gives our agency a great competitive advantage. Most advertising goes off the deep end when it tries to sell. We never tell people to buy our clients’ products. We give them permission to do what they want to do.”

Some advertising can be unintentionally deceiving. Ken Mandelbaum once worked for Hal Riney & Partners, which created the original Bartles & Jaymes spots that feature the two fictional pitchmen for the Gallo wine cooler. When Mandelbaum went to open an account at a major California bank, the branch manager was convinced that Bartles & Jaymes were not actors but the winery’s founders.

“When I told her they were actors, she thought I was putting her on,” said Mandelbaum, now president of Mandelbaum Mooney Ashley. “But I’ve never worked at an agency where you sit and figure how to dupe the consumer.”

Two ad executives objected strongly to the premise of “Crazy People.”

“People don’t realize it, but advertising is the most policed, safeguarded industry around,” said Einstein of Dailey & Associates. “Every claim has to be substantiated with reams of documents.”

And Vic Olesen, president of Vic Olesen & Partners, which creates ads for Chevrolet, wonders if the film “Crazy People” will be advertised truthfully. He suggested this ad: “This is an average movie with an aging star who spends most of his time sulking in his own restaurant. And it was written by a guy with no agency experience who is also a pessimist.”

Disney Theater Ad Ban a Boon for Slides

Walt Disney has given Bob Martin a new lease on life. His company, National Cinema Network, places slide-show advertisements in theaters. When Disney recently announced that it would no longer tolerate commercials broadcast in theaters showing its films, it did not rule out slide shows.

Now Martin, president of the Kansas City company, says he plans to “upgrade” his slide shows and sell them to more chains. Although each tray of 81 slides will still have about 25 ads, the remaining slides will be more entertaining, he said.

“I can sit here with a great deal of confidence and tell you that people won’t boo at our programs,” he said.

Currently, the extra slides often feature film trivia. But the new shows--which will begin screening in Los Angeles by April--will also feature an array of “Memorable Moments” from recent films and “Classic Clips” from older films. Said Martin: “If you’re on a date and you don’t know what else to talk about, these slides will stimulate conversation.”

Suzuki Runner-Up Appeals to Dealers

The Los Angeles agency that finished second to Asher/Gould in the race for the Suzuki advertising business late last year continues to snatch various Suzuki dealer association accounts throughout the state.

Hakuhodo Advertising won a combined $1 million in annual billings from Suzuki dealer groups in Seattle and San Francisco. It already handles about $1 million in annual billings from Suzuki dealer outfits in San Diego, Phoenix and Los Angeles.

Said Hakuhodo spokeswoman Jo DeLyon, “We’re demonstrating our capabilities to do automotive advertising.”

No Smoking on Flights Sparks CigArrest Ads

Peter Stranger happily marked Feb. 26 on his calendar. That’s not his birthday, his anniversary or, for that matter, a day off from work.

It is the day on which a regulation banning smoking takes effect on all domestic flights lasting six hours or less. And the new client that his Los Angeles ad agency recently picked up is counting on that day as a major marketing tool.

The client: Advantage Life Products, a Laguna Hills maker of CigArrest stop-smoking products and chewing gum, which the company claims helps stop the tobacco craving. The company’s annual billings are estimated at $4 million. And Stranger, who is president of the Los Angeles office of Della Femina, McNamee WCRS, believes that as more people are told that they can’t smoke in places such as airplanes and office buildings, they will turn to products such as CigArrest.

“This is not just for those who want to quit,” said Stranger. “It is also for smokers who are stuck in places where they are not allowed to smoke.”

He said his agency will create some humorous ads depicting these situations. Stranger himself quit smoking about 10 years ago. But not because he wanted to.

“I met a woman who didn’t like my smoking,” he said. “My wife.”

Bank Offers Depositors a Waldorf Weekend

Some banks will do almost anything to get your money. A New York bank is even waving a weekend at the Waldorf Astoria at its big-ticket customers. Commercial Bank of New York, an 18-month-old bank with assets of $278 million, offers two (taxable) weekend nights and breakfasts at the Waldorf (estimated value: $425) to customers who purchase 30-month, $100,000 certificates of deposit. Interest rates on these CDs have recently varied between 8.5% and 8.875%.

A recent newspaper ad showed a photo of a Waldorf room key under this headline: “We’re offering this particular CD with some reservations.”