It was a tense moment on the...

It was a tense moment on the downtown YMCA basketball court.

Vice President Dan Quayle, in town for a series of fund-raising speeches, made a surprise visit to the Y about 6:30 a.m. Monday.

“Our highest-ranking visitor,” executive director Jim Havlick said later, “though some of our members probably think they rank above him.”

Quayle joined in a 3-on-3 game while Secret Service agents watched from the running track above.

He was guarded--in the basketball, not security, sense--by a Y member.

When the veep, who goes to his right better than he goes to his left, attempted one shot, his opponent blocked it.

The Secret Service men stiffened, but chose not to intervene.

A visitor to the L.A. Police Protective League the other day would have seen a display of leather cases that were just the right size to house assault weapons in the war against crime. They were emblazoned with LAPD badges and carried the motto: “Protecting Those Who Protect Others.”

New cases for SWAT team members, perhaps?

Actually, they were personalized golf bags offered as prizes by the police union in a charity tournament.

To qualify for one, officers still had to be accurate shots, though.

Pointing out that “it’s better to get out too early than wait too long,” Dr. Archie Steele has retired from medical practice.

After all, he is 91.

The oldest practicing physician in L.A. County, Steele was still making 15 to 20 house calls a day at the age of 90.

“A doctor’s business is to help people who need him, so he might as well go when and where they need him,” explained Steele, a 1924 graduate of Loma Linda University Medical School.

As a youth, however, he felt that physicians were “a bunch of bums,” because of poor medical treatment his sickly mother received. She later became his patient and lived to be 97.

The Nova Scotia-born Steele, who received telegrams from President Bush and Canadian Prime Minister Brian Mulroney on his retirement, said he plans to catch up on yard work.

But, the nonagenarian added: “I’ll have to be careful about climbing on the roof.”

When disc jockey Roger Barkley hosted a show on KFI radio, he occasionally chatted with Judge Roy Bean, an ill-tempered character portrayed by his then-partner, Al Lohman.

Obviously, Gov. George Deukmejian was impressed with Barkley’s questioning of Bean.

The Duke has named Barkley to the nine-member state Commission on Judicial Performance, which deals with complaints against (real-life) California judges.

A Republican activist, Barkley was emceeing a function for Assemblyman Pat Nolan (R-Glendale) when the governor announced the appointment to fill a vacancy on the panel, which includeds five judges, two lawyers and two members of the public.

Asked if there is any qualification for the public members, Commission Director Jack Frankel said: “Only that they not be judges or retired judges or lawyers.”

Lohman, meanwhile, vowed: “I expect to get a similar appointment when my political party takes power.”

The Democrats?

“The Mugwumps,” he answered.