The most infamous machine in Beverly Hills,...

The most infamous machine in Beverly Hills, Zsa Zsa Gabor’s Rolls-Royce, is going on the auction block in Tulsa, Okla., this weekend. Auctioneer Gary Bennett said the Cop Slapper herself is not expected to attend. Let’s hope he remembers to clean out the glove compartment.

Two of the Southland’s Big Three races--the L.A. Marathon and the Long Beach Grand Prix--have already been held, but there’s still the Great Southern California Duck Race.

About 20,000 competitors will be dropped into the water near the Santa Monica Pier at 1 p.m. today. The quackers, sponsored for $5 apiece by donors to benefit Childrens Hospital Los Angeles, will float for shore, with a prize of a trip to Hawaii for the winning owner.

The ducks, incidentally, are plastic. You didn’t think they’d subject live animals to that polluted mess, did you?

We mentioned Friday that Caltrans--the agency you love to hate--had invited drivers to phone in sightings of broken sprinklers flooding the freeways.

Caltrans might as well have put up a sign that said, “Kick me.”

Its offices began receiving so many complaints Friday that a representative asked us to publish one central number ((213)-620-3077) so the rest of the agency could go about its work.

Just like old times. . . . Perennial candidate Eileen Anderson, who has her eyes on the gubernatorial office this year, picketed KCBS Channel 2 Friday after she learned that she would not be allowed in Sunday’s televised debate with the other hopefuls.

Anderson, you may recall, danced in a bikini on the corner of Main and Temple streets every weekday afternoon for 15 years to protest what she claimed was mistreatment by Secret Service agents in 1972.

She finally quit when the city turned down her request to be allowed to use Mayor Tom Bradley’s parking place when it was vacant.

The L.A. Board of Public Works will take up recommendations on Monday to designate stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame for John Philip Sousa and . . .

Little Richard.

We don’t know about you, but we can’t think of one without thinking of the other.

If the chamber holds a joint ceremony, we hope the band remembers to play our favorite, “The Good Golly Miss Molly March.”

This weekend’s “Los Angeles at the Los Angeles” downtown film festival to benefit the L.A. Historic Theatre Foundation includes a showing of “Mildred Pierce,” with that immortal line by working woman/mother Joan Crawford:

“I’m never going back to Glendale.”

miscelLAny:

The Redondo Beach City Council once voted to adopt the Goodyear Blimp as the city’s official bird, though the creature’s nest is really in Carson.