Ways to Recognize a Direct Hit by Cupid

People often ask me, “How do I know when a date is going well?” Or, “How can I tell if someone is the one for me?”

In this, my farewell Single Life column, I leave you with my sure-fire criteria to assist you in recognizing when Cupid has scored a bull’s-eye to your heart:

Feeling generous with your time: You don’t mind missing “L.A. Law.” You don’t rush to replay your answering machine when you’re together. You don’t keep checking your watch. You volunteer to help him pack and move on your only day off. You happily assemble her exercise bike. You look forward to his child’s 7:30 a.m. soccer game. You don’t mind taking her to the airport during rush hour.

Feeling fulfilled: You aren’t hungry after the date is over. You don’t care that he’s not a mogul. You don’t compare her to your last lover. You think his absent-mindedness is a sign of genius. You think her ditsyness is adorable. You don’t care what his sign is. You don’t crave a cigarette all evening. You can’t help smiling at the sound of her voice. You don’t say in front of friends, “You’ve told that story a million times.” You haven’t screamed or honked your horn while driving in months.

Making future plans: You imagine your first name linked with his last. You wonder what kind of mother she’d be or what kind of father he’d be. You think you might not move East after all. You would rather marry her than live together.

Opening yourself up to new ideas: You tell him, “Sure, I love camping!” You tell her, “I’d love to take you to the opera!” You--a former confirmed bachelor--don’t mind that she has four children under the age of 10.

Finding your soul mate: You have both seen “Casablanca” 18 times. You think of him or her first when you have good news or when you need sound advice. Your children don’t cry when the two of you leave on a date. You trust him with your best friend. You want what’s best for her even if it’s not what you want. You know what he’s going to say before he says it.

Bringing out your romantic side: You bring her lilacs “just because.” You buy him a baseball card for his collection for the same good reason. You send a Valentine’s Day card in July. You slow dance in your apartment--just the two of you.