Rex Reed’s Appearance at Lecture Series Is a Hot Ticket

Movie critic Rex Reed has grown numb watching the Persian Gulf War on television.

“The other night I got so tired of it,” he says, “all of those Scud missiles, all of those children in gas masks, that I turned to the old movie ‘Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House.’ It was the only moment of joy I had in a week of sadness and despair.”

Escape. That was the reason we used to go to the movies, says Reed, star of television’s “At the Movies.” “But we can’t go to escape now. Most movies are depressing. Even the good ones, and there are few good ones.”

That message, along with how he became one of the country’s most visible (and some say its most acid-tongued) film critic, will be on Reed’s agenda when he speaks at 10:30 a.m. today in Edwards Cinema at Newport Center Fashion Island.

Reed’s appearance launches Orange County society’s most popular lecture series, the “Town Hall Celebrity Series,” co-sponsored by the Assistance Leagues of Laguna Beach and Newport Beach.

He’s sensitive about being called “a vicious, bitchy writer,” says the man who scalded Madonna in print after seeing her in “Dick Tracy.” (“I said she looked like she needed a bath, that her armpits probably smelled like Bloody Marys,” Reed admits with a laugh. “Anybody who thinks this is the new Marilyn Monroe has got to be kidding.”)

“All I’m really interested in is raising the quality of the art that we’re being asked to pay for,” he says. “If the only way I can do that is by being humorous, then that’s the way it must be. I want my tombstone to read: ‘He tried.’ ”

One of the reasons movies are no longer escapist, Reed claims, is that women have lost their predominant role in film. “Even good actresses today have to fight to find anything worth playing. And if you’re over 40, you’re left for a grease spot on the side of the road,” he says.

Last year, Reed took his good friend, Oscar-winning actress Claire Trevor (billionaire Donald Bren’s stepmum) out to celebrate her 80th birthday. “Now, there’s an actress,” says Reed, who holes up in a 1785 farmhouse on 38 acres in Connecticut. “We did Manhattan--saw Peggy Lee and then went pub crawling. At 2 in the morning, Claire joined a jazz pianist and sang “Moanin’ Low” from “Key Largo.” She just didn’t want to go home. Imagine, being 80 and having a ball!”

Like Trevor, who once lived in Newport Beach, Reed is no stranger to Orange County. He’s done Disneyland, he says, and the Laguna Beach art scene. And Knott’s Berry Farm. “Once, before sailing out of Long Beach on the QE II, I had someone drive me to Knott’s just to have their chicken dinner,” he says.

After his appearance, Reed will head for Los Angeles to spend time with his good friend, actress Jean Simmons. “Now there’s an example,” he says. “Jean just did a film for television, and she says all she does in it is pour tea and open French doors. Terrible.”

More of Reed’s observations:

* On a favorite movie: “For sheer entertainment as art, there’s nothing like ‘The Wizard of Oz.’ I love the MGM musicals.”

* Cher: “I’m too old to stir up a lot of interest in anybody covered with tattoos who is always willing to show them. But I must say I like her independent spirit.”

* Meryl Streep: “Good, but boring. She is acting all over the screen all the time. There’s nothing for me to do in the audience. She’s already done all of the work! And she never stops crying.”

* Glenn Close: “I don’t find her attractive, but she can act. I don’t remember her after I leave the theater.”

* Angela Lansbury: “Interesting, exudes such a feeling of peace. This is a woman who has swallowed the secret to serenity.”

No hamburgers, please: It’s going to be a veal feast for the well-wishers who turn out for former President Ronald Reagan’s 80th birthday bash on Feb. 6 at the Beverly Hilton. And hamburger mogul Carl Karcher, who is taking his wife Margaret to the affair, doesn’t mind one bit. After all, you expect more than a Super Star when you ante up $25,000 for a table for 10. (Not to mention the fact that Margaret Thatcher will be on hand at the benefit for Reagan’s presidential library. Ground beef just wouldn’t do.)

You have to hand it to Karcher. The canny entrepreneur came up with a way to beat the hefty price tag. Oh, he bought a table all right. But he’s keeping two seats and selling the remainder for $5,000 a couple. “I’m selling tickets to friends,” said Karcher, who turned 74 recently.

Karcher will also attend a private luncheon with Reagan and Thatcher on Feb. 4 in the Arco Tower in Los Angeles. Arco Chairman Lodwrick Cooke, also chairman of the birthday bash, will host the very private affair.

“Reagan was an outstanding leader during his two terms,” Karcher said. “I think a chance to celebrate his birthday with him is outstanding.” Liza Minnelli will entertain, and we hear the flavor will be chocolate-truffle when Reagan puts another candle on his birthday cake.

Puttin’ on the Ritz: KCBS Channel 2 news anchor Bree Walker will celebrate her first wedding anniversary when she holes up at the Ritz-Carlton with husband Jim Lampley the weekend of Feb. 9. But not before she speaks on the same day at the “Women Helping Women” seminar sponsored by South Coast Medical Center at the Dana Point Resort. Walker will be the keynote speaker at the event, which is open to the public.

The medical center is picking up the tab for Walker’s two-night stay at the Ritz. “Her television contract doesn’t allow her to charge a fee,” said hospital spokesman Kirk Wilks. “So we told her we’d pay for her stay at the Ritz, where she and Jim got married.”