Giving Is as Good as It Gets in O.C.

People always ask me: “How can you go to all of those parties? “ and I always answer: “Do you have a week?”

It would take that long to explain how wonderful it can be to stand in a ballroom crowded with volunteers who, after months of planning, have created a stunning event that nets thousands of dollars for charity.

It would take even longer to list the acts of kindness I have seen: The raffle prize winner who bestowed his windfall on the charity whence it came. The shy woman whose thousands of hours in volunteer work were recognized in a surprise ceremony witnessed by hundreds of cheering friends. The socialite so touched by a cause she wrote out a check for $5,000 on the spot. The couple who regularly underwrite parties because they “have been given so much.”

Charity events give Orange County its soul. Without them, the Performing Arts Center might never have been built. Children’s Hospital of Orange County might not be in a position to never turn away a child for lack of money. The Patty and George Hoag Cancer Center might be a dream. The list goes on.

Now, the thousands who make up Orange County’s social set are counting the days until the season begins (officially, Sept. 14, with the South Coast Repertory gala. Unofficially on Sept. 7, with the gala launch of the Emporio Armani boutique at South Coast Plaza.)

They are having their gowns fitted, tuxes pressed and their cars triple-waxed, in preparation for the social season.

“It’s wonderful to be near the power--to be where everything is happening. It’s hypnotic,” says Sandra Beigel of Newport Beach, for several years a fixture on the local charity circuit. “But you have to be careful. You can wear yourself out.”

Socialite Tina Schafnitz of Newport Beach says a high-profile member of Orange County’s social scene must budget between $25,000 and $50,000 per year to survive in style. And it’s not just a matter of popping for a ticket anymore, she says. Because of the recession, charities want more.

“First, they ask you to be a patron,” Schafnitz says, “then they ask you to be an underwriter, then a sponsor--then a major sponsor. Each time they add another word, the price goes up by $5,000.”

But she loves it. “I’m involved because it’s fun to be inside of what’s happening in the town you live in,” Schafnitz says. “We happen to live in Orange County, U.S.A., which is booming and exciting. If I wanted to stay home, I would have lived in Kansas and raised sheep.”

In 1989, Schafnitz and her husband, Matt, attended 45 galas. “Matt asked me why I had so many long dresses, so I counted up the black-tie events we’d attended,” Schafnitz says, “and I told him, ‘ That’s why I have them.’ ”

How can you go to all of those parties ? “It’s good to go out with friends,” she says. “I mean, we don’t attend an event just to attend. We call around, find out who’s going, say to our friends: ‘Let’s go, sit at the same table, have fun.’ ”

If the entertainment is poor, “I tell jokes,” she says. “Or, if we hear it’s going to be just a beer and wine party, some of our friends pack pocket-rockets (tiny bottles of liquor).

“The point is, you choose to support a charity and then you make it fun .”

For Janice Johnson of Laguna Beach--during 1989 and 1990, chairwoman of the Guilds of the Orange County Performing Arts Center (a volunteer position that took her to about 150 parties)--discipline is the key to surviving the social whirl. “I drank very little,” she says. “I never finished my plate. And I got plenty of sleep. Otherwise, I might never have made it.”

Aside from the desire to help others and be on the scene, there’s incredible pressure to participate socially, says party veteran Ann Pange of Newport Beach. “I go to 75 or 80 parties a year,” she says. “This summer, I’ve nearly frozen to death at 20 barbecues.

“There’s a lot of pressure to be there. If you don’t go, people might think (she laughs) you weren’t invited, or, if it’s a charity affair, that you can’t afford it .”

Over the years, Pange has watched Orange County’s social calendar change from a party or two per week to a dozen choices per weekend. “Socially speaking, it’s getting to be a difficult county to live in,” she says. “There’s so much pressure to go to everything.”

“I love being with people and seeing them on a regular basis, but it’s almost getting to be too much. I’m trying to define my participation now. Pick certain parties. The time comes when you have to choose.”

Etc.: Saks Fifth Avenue at South Coast Plaza will be the scene of a what-to-wear fashion show on Sept. 6. Seems the benefit Hunt Breakfast being staged at Joan Irvine Smith’s equestrian center on behalf of the UC Irvine College of Medicine on Sept. 15 has breakfast-goers wondering what to wear. Fashion-show-goers will include breakfast committee members and table patrons. . . . Along Came Mary, a hot Los Angeles caterer, will cook up the fare at Cartier’s gala reopening at South Coast Plaza on Sept. 21. . . . A bevy of socialites attended a luncheon and fall fashion preview at I. Magnin on Friday. There’s a trend away from fashion-show extravaganzas. Intimate, in-store sartorial parades are the thing. . . . Virginia and Jerry Barnard will celebrate their 70th wedding anniversary on Sunday in Laguna Hills. The couple were active on Orange County’s social scene during the ‘20s and count some members of the Balboa Bay Club as friends. . . . David Tappan, retired chairman of Fluor Corp., will be honored as Industrialist of the Year on Oct. 16 by the California Museum of Science and Industry. Locals will join Tappan and his wife, Jeanne, to celebrate the honor at the Beverly Wilshire Hotel in Los Angeles.