A New Dad Decides It’s Worth Every Penny

Thomson Elizabeth Biddle Jaffe kicked her mother for the last time at 5:22 a.m. on Oct. 6, 1991.

She came into the world at 8 pounds, 9 ounces and 21 1/2 inches long, a blaze of sound and motion on a gentle, rainy autumn morn.

That’s the beginning of the birth announcement my wife and I wrote for our first child.

It goes on to tell our baby some tenets we hope she will live by on her way to a long, happy life.

What it doesn’t say is that our little bundle of joy has only just started to kick me.

And in a soft spot too, right where I keep my wallet.

Not that I’m complaining. Becoming a father is, without a doubt, the most energizing, emotional experience I’ve ever had.

But in those few free moments when I’m not either marveling at the joys of fatherhood, changing her diapers or sleeping, I’ve been wondering how, exactly, I’ll be able to afford a family.

“Children have many benefits, but they also have many costs,” said Dr. Mark Lino, head of the Family Economics Research Group, an arm of the U.S. Department of Agriculture that compiles statistics on the cost of raising a family.

“Having children involves many dimensions, one of them being economic. People need to be conscious of what it will cost to raise a family. Children do have price tags.”

Silly me, I never even thought to look for a price tag. (It’s probably one of those “Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law” jobs; I bet the doctor ripped it off at birth.)

If the federal government is right, it will cost about $300,000 just to get my little girl to age 18. And the way costs are going, it will be $240,000 to $300,000 for four years of college beginning in 2009.

The government, which develops these statistics to help set adequate child-support levels and not to terrorize new fathers, includes the cost of food, housing, clothing, health care, child care, education, transportation and more.

They miss certain obvious expenditures--braces, a personal computer--and not-so-apparent desires--piano lessons, summer camp.

If we add on a private school education, that could add $200,000 to the tab. Toss in a few years of preschool to add $10,000 or so.

And that’s all before we ever take a vacation.

I can easily foresee spending close to $1 million on little Thomson Elizabeth by the time she reaches age 22.

With prudent savings, even the heaviest financial burdens can be lessened. And the time to start is now. The longer we wait, the more difficult our financial chores will be.

For example, let’s assume it will cost $240,000 to pay for my daughter’s college education and that I want to have all of that money set aside by the time she is 18. If I start saving now, that should be no problem.

Using a monthly investment work sheet, I figured that if I could lock in a 9% compound rate of return on my investment, I’d have to set aside only $446.40 per month.

If Thomson goes to an Ivy League school--where costs are projected to be about $300,000 for four years--I’ll need to set aside $558 a month to be ready by the time she is 18.

With the additional costs associated with the day-to-day raising of a child, which for us will be close to $10,000 next year alone, according to the government, no one has an easy time scraping together any savings.

But that doesn’t mean I don’t want to start setting money aside now and letting it work for me, because it will only get worse if I put it off.

For example, if I don’t put aside college money until Thomson is 8, I would then have to set aside $1,551 per month to pay for an Ivy League education.

Of course, it’s not as dire as it sounds. People have been raising children for centuries without checking the price tag.

Lino says, “You can raise a happy child without going overboard trying to keep up with the social status of the times.” That translates into “Sorry, Thomson, you’ll never wear a pair of Air Jordans.”

In spite of all my financial worries, having this child has made me realize how much better off we are than most people. We’ll find a way to get her to and through college, and she’ll have a lot opportunities along the way that other kids miss out on. Besides, money simply is not everything.

If it were, I would never have ordered those fancy birth announcements.

The bottom line, as it turns out, is sleeping on my left shoulder right now.

And she’s perfect.

Damn the price tag, full kid ahead.

God bless you, child, it’s going to be great having you with us.