High Life / A WEEKLY FORUM FOR HIGH SCHOOL STUDENTS : Playing the Dating Game, Teen-Style : Relationships: Four high school juniors talk about going out and the qualities they look for in the opposite sex.

When one teen-ager decides to ask another out on a date, all sorts of questions run through his or her mind: Where should we go? What should we do? What will it cost? How will the evening end? And what might the one date lead to?

Recently, four Sunny Hills High School juniors gave their informal opinions on the fine art of teen dating.

The two boys and two girls all said they looked for many of the same qualities in the person they wished to date. Honesty, a sense of humor and a positive attitude are among the most desirable. Good looks were mentioned, though not as the most important asset.

Chaghig Minassian said she also looks for creativity and charm. “Something that strikes me as different, something that catches my eye,” she said of future companions.

Bryan Campanelli stressed it’s important for a girl to have a sense of humor, because “if you can’t laugh, you can’t have a good time.”

Being athletic is important to Brian Volpp, for then the girl “is more willing to do physical activities, such as jogging or riding a bike.”

Contrary to popular belief that smart girls don’t get asked out on dates, the Sunny Hills students agreed it isn’t necessary for girls to act dumb to be appealing.

“I suppose some girls do act dumb, but I wouldn’t,” Minassian said.

So how do guys feel about girls asking them out?

“I’m all for it,” Campanelli said.

Volpp said he knew a lot of boys who wished girls would do the asking, adding that many boys find the chore difficult.

Minassian agreed that girls should take the initiative, but said she wouldn’t because “I’m too scared of rejection.”

Campanelli has known that feeling firsthand, saying he “feels stupid and uncomfortable around a girl who rejects me.”

Volpp looked at a recent rejection more optimistically. He had been turned down after asking a girl to a dance, but he didn’t feel too badly because another boy had asked her to the dance--and she had accepted--only five minutes earlier.

“I kept thinking that if I had called only 10 minutes earlier, she would have gone with me,” he said.

The teens also agreed that dates didn’t require large expenditures of money.

“I think the best dates are the ones that take the least amount of money,” said Minassian, adding that she likes the boy to be creative when it comes to planning a date--something different than dinner and movie.

Campanelli suggested a date could consist of a simple walk on the beach.

The girls thought they should help pay for the date if they worked up enough courage to do the asking. “Even if a boy offers to pay for the date, the girl should pay for more than half,” Sophia Lau said.

Countered Volpp: “Traditionally, the cost of a date falls on the boy.”

Added Campanelli: “I don’t mind having to pay for it all, no matter who asked who first.”

As the evening’s activities draw to a close, both boys and girls agreed the ending of the date depends on how well the date went.

If the couple had a good time, then a hug or maybe a kiss good night would be appropriate. But if the couple didn’t hit it off or the evening had too many awkward moments, then it’s time to just say goodby and walk away.

“It’s polite to thank the girl for going out with you,” Volpp reminded.

If the two had a good time and decide to continue their relationship, soon comes the inevitable question of going steady. According to Volpp, going steady is “a formal step toward making a commitment.”

Most of the teens believed going steady was a good idea overall, but differed as to its advantages and disadvantages.

“Going steady gives you someone to count on and makes you feel special to someone,” Lau said. “But going steady also limits a person so that he or she cannot meet different people.”

Said Minassian: “It’s a good experience, but I think that at least in high school, one should go out with more people.”

Campanelli said going steady makes him feel good to have made the commitment, adding that he “doesn’t see any disadvantages.”

Volpp said going steady teaches a person how to treat someone in a romantic relationship, but added that the disadvantage occurs after the couple breaks up, when the one with the stronger feelings gets hurt the most.

The teens agreed that the best way to break up is to “tell the person that you feel the relationship is not working and that we need to move on.”

They also agreed that the trite goodby phrase of “We can still be friends” should never be used in mixed company.