Mom’s Happy to Lie in Her Family Bed

Re “Family Bed” (Jan. 3): Dr. William Sears might find it interesting to know of an arrangement suggested by my former husband when our son was a newborn. The baby was a bit colicky, and he thought that a little pressure on the tummy might provide relief, so we tried having him sleep draped over my stomach.

At first I was dubious, afraid of sleeping poorly or rolling over and sending him flying. Some instinct must have taken over, however, because I slept fine and stayed put.

This had the great advantage of sparing me the need to get up to nurse him in the night. All I had to do was scoot up a little and my baby was already positioned.

My son is now 4 and still sleeps on a futon next to my bed--or I sleep on a futon next to his. Recently, one of his friends introduced him to a story intended to alleviate children’s fears of nightmares, but he still hasn’t quite figured out what a nightmare is.

I am quite annoyed by suggestions that sleeping with parents will turn a child into a pervert: I can recall my own childhood needs for the warmth and security of my parents’ bed (usually unmet); Oedipal longings had nothing to do with it and, as mentioned in the article, the parents can have sex elsewhere once the child is asleep.

LORNA SADLER-AKHIL

Los Angeles