Holiday Tea Raises $1,000 for Teen Home

Women who share a common Christmas wish--to establish a shelter for pregnant teens in Orange County--gathered for holiday tea Saturday to help realize their dream.

Held in the Tustin home of JoAnn Gilbert, the Christmas tea attracted about 35 guests who have been working to start Mary’s Shelter, a home where girls under age 18 can stay and have their babies. The $25-per-person tea and boutique added about $1,000 to the $40,000 that has been raised for the shelter.

Food for Thought

The Gilbert home was decked out in Christmas decorations, with poinsettias everywhere and tables set with holiday china.

“This is the one time of year I go nuts with decorating,” Gilbert said.

Guests sipped tea and nibbled at finger sandwiches, scones and rich desserts. After tea, they listened to two teen-age girls describe what it’s like to be young, pregnant and on their own.

“When I told my mom I was pregnant, she didn’t care. She didn’t want anything to do with it,” said a 17-year-old mother of a 1-year-old girl. Mary’s Shelter would provide a place for homeless girls to live during their pregnancy and for three months after the baby is born.

Residents would receive counseling to help them decide whether to keep the child or give it up for adoption. While working on their high school educations, the girls would be taught job and parenting skills and receive help in finding a permanent home.

“There’s a network of homes for women over 18 but nothing for girls who are minors,” said Joan Basile, president of Mary’s Shelter.

On Their Own

Often the pregnant girls are rejected by their families and take refuge in the homes of friends.

“There are all kinds of reasons why they end up homeless,” said guest speaker Joyce Stone, teen-mother program counselor for the Garden Grove Unified School District. “Typically, there were many family problems before the girl got pregnant. The incidence of sexual abuse is high for teen mothers.

“The pregnancy is the last straw. The family can’t handle it . . . so the girls bounce around from friend to friend.”

The idea for Mary’s Shelter began in 1987 with Jan Lindsay, who had started a similar shelter in St. Paul, Minn. When Lindsay had to move from Orange County, she asked Basile to take over the project.

Since 1989 Basile and other volunteers have been working to raise money to buy a home that can accommodate up to 12 residents.

“We need a break,” Basile said. “My Christmas wish is for someone to say, ‘I have a home you can use’ so we can start serving these girls.”

Others who attended the tea were Donna Ostrander, Evie Pilkington, Bonnie Pollak, Betty Saik and Gean Sudbeck.