Family a Part of Rabbinical History : Michele Paskow-Cohen is one of 325 women rabbis nationwide, and belongs to one of the few father-daughter rabbi teams in the country.

Aaron Daniel Cohen’s relatives have started referring to him as the “Rabbi in Training.” That may seem like a rather formidable nickname to tag on the guy, especially when you consider that he’s just 1 1/2 years old.

But take into account the toddler’s roots.

Aaron’s grandpa, Shimon Paskow, has been the rabbi at Temple Etz Chaim in Thousand Oaks since 1969. His mom, Rabbi Michele Paskow-Cohen, is in her second year as the religious leader of Congregation B’nai Emet in Simi Valley.

(And don’t forget Aaron’s father, Cantor Jeffrey Cohen, who shares the Etz Chaim pulpit with his father-in-law, leading the congregation in the musical portions of the service.)

So the religious field is not exactly a long shot for little Aaron.

Regardless of whether Aaron becomes a third generation rabbi, the Paskows are already part of rabbinical history.

MEMBER OF SELECT GROUP

As with other major religions, the presence of women in important Jewish clerical positions is a fairly new concept. His mother is one of 325 women rabbis in the nation. And his grandfather and mother hold the distinction of being the only father-daughter chaplains in the armed forces.

The reformed Jewish movement began accepting women rabbis in 1972, with the Reconstructionist movement following immediately thereafter. The first woman rabbi in the conservative movement was ordained in 1985. And the orthodox movement has yet to see its first woman rabbi.

As rare as women rabbis are, they represent a relative glut, when compared with the number who share the title with their fathers.

“I’m sure we’re talking about a handful of father-daughter rabbis in the country now,” said Rabbi Allan Kensky, associate dean of the Rabbinical School of the Jewish Theological Seminary in New York. “Ten would be on the high side.”

Carol Paskow, Shimon’s wife and Michele’s mother, is proud that her husband and daughter are among the small group. She sees them as being at the forefront of a significant and overdue shift in the practice of Judaism.

“Men have been doing it for 5,000 years--following their fathers and becoming rabbis,” she said. “Now, I think you will see more women following in the footsteps of their fathers who are rabbis, maybe in the footsteps of their mothers who are rabbis.”

Talk about following footsteps. The Paskows have practically worn the same shoes.

Paskow, 61, and Paskow-Cohen, 30, were both ordained by the Hebrew Union College of New York. They both had their ordination ceremonies at the same New York synagogue. They both serve as rabbis in the U.S. Army Reserve. They even met their respective spouses in respective synagogues.

And now they both lead Jewish congregations in east Ventura County. “But,” assured Paskow, “there is no nepotism.”

The influence of the two rabbis is far-reaching. Paskow’s conservative Temple Etz Chaim, incorporated in 1963, has about 750 member families. Most of the congregants come from Ventura County, but people come from the San Fernando Valley to the east and Santa Maria to the north.

Paskow-Cohen’s B’nai Emet has a membership of about 100 families. The congregation has been around for 14 years, but rented its first permanent facility earlier this month. Previously, it had been renting space in a neighboring church.

Those who have watched father and daughter work say they have similar goals: to make Judaism appealing to a Jewish community that is becoming increasingly assimilated.

“Their approach really is that the bema (pulpit) itself does not belong exclusively to the rabbi and the cantor,” Cohen said. “It belongs to the entire congregation.”

Paskow-Cohen, the first permanent rabbi in the history of B’nai Emet--previous rabbis have been students--said her role is, in part, to show people what Judaism has to offer.

“We try to get people involved and make it meaningful to them,” she said. “Most people here aren’t involved not because they don’t care, but because they don’t realize Judaism is there, or because it’s not interesting. . . . I think the rabbi’s role is to be a teacher. That’s what my great love is, to be able to share what I think is so exciting and exhilarating.”

Like daughter, like father.

“A rabbi is a teacher of traditions, of the Torah, of the text,” Paskow said. “A rabbi’s role is to understand it all, to interpret it, to give a moral lesson, to give some meaning to life.”

At last week’s Rosh Hashanah services, Paskow reminded the congregants that it was exactly 50 years ago that the people of Denmark saved their Jewish population from the Nazis. Of course, the story had a moral.

“We are thankful and grateful to the Danes for what they did,” he said. “And what the lesson is, is that there are good people in the world also, not everybody is evil. You must always see the good rather than just the evil.”

Since it was the Jewish New Year, one of the two most holy days of the year, Paskow had the attention of a large crowd when he told the story. It’s no secret that the High Holidays bring out many Jews who ordinarily do not go to temple.

Paskow expected upward of 2,000 worshipers at services for Yom Kippur (the Day of Repentance) Friday and Saturday. Paskow said it doesn’t bother him that most of those folks will not make another temple appearance until the same time next year.

“It amazes me that people come at all. You can’t knock it. I don’t ridicule it. I don’t make fun of it,” he said. “I have more respect for those who come than for those who don’t come.”

CAMP COUNSELOR

Paskow grew up in an ultra-religious household in New Jersey, his orthodox grandparents lived nearby, and he received an orthodox Jewish education at the Yeshiva in New York.

So he naturally wanted to be a religious leader, right? Not exactly.

“I was not really interested in becoming a rabbi,” he said. “That really happened when I was a counselor at camp one summer.”

It was while attending this Jewish camp that a 19-year-old Paskow was asked to lead religious services in place of the regular leader, who was ill. Things went so smoothly that Paskow was asked to repeat the performance the following year. After that second time around, a camp official made him an offer.

“He told me he had 35 Jewish families in the town he lived in and asked if I would do services for the High Holidays,” Paskow said. “I laughed. I really wasn’t qualified. I was not competent.”

Initially, Paskow declined, but after a little coaxing he agreed to accept the proposition.

“So I called a friend of mine, Solly, from college, who also went to the Yeshiva,” Paskow recalled. “Solly had a nice voice--he could sing. I said, ‘Solly, don’t hang up on me and don’t crack up. I took a job as a rabbi and you’re the cantor.’ ”

The two novice clergymen had some cramming to do before they could lead the Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur services for this small congregation in Bloomfield, Conn.

“I didn’t know too much,” he said. “I went out and did a lot of research to find out what Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur meant.”

Paskow presented his new information to the congregants. “They liked it,” he said, “because they didn’t know what Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur meant either.”

That was 40 years ago this week. And things haven’t been the same since.

Paskow and Solly were invited back the following year, at which point Paskow decided to attend rabbinical school.

“I learned a lot about where the Jewish traditions came from, the Jewish history, the Jewish philosophy,” he said. “Judaism is an intellectual romance, trying to understand what life is all about, to uplift people, help people, give it some sense. Otherwise many people are depressed and find no sense and meaning to life.”

After graduation Paskow went to Cincinnati to teach, and to study for his doctorate at the Hebrew Union College campus there. He worked weekends at a temple in West Virginia.

“It was a very good experience,” he said, “because it took me down to the south, with Jewish people speaking with Southern accents.”

When Paskow entered rabbinical school, the students had to agree to serve as chaplains in the military upon graduation. Paskow chose the army and, in 1959, was sent to northeast France. During his tour of duty, he met his wife.

Paskow served in the military from 1960 to 1961. After his discharge, he took a job at a temple in Texas. Shortly thereafter, he and his wife moved to California, where Paskow became the rabbi at Valley Jewish Community Center (now Congregation Adat Ariel) in North Hollywood.

In 1969, Paskow joined Temple Etz Chaim. At the time, the congregation numbered about 75 families. It now has a membership 10 times larger.

“The area grew and people started to come to her from outlying areas,” he said. “This is now the largest, most active Jewish temple between Encino and San Jose.”

During his time in the county, Paskow has devoted himself to many aspects of Jewish life. He helped establish a local kosher butcher shop, a Jewish bakery, and exclusively Jewish sections at cemeteries in Westlake and Camarillo.

Earlier this summer, Paskow was honored by the Beverly Hills chapter of the American Friends of the Hebrew University of Jerusalem for his longtime involvement with its educational programs. Since his arrival in Thousand Oaks, he has each year taken children from his temple to the Hebrew University’s annual academic conference.

His daughter was one of those children.

CALIFORNIA KID

Needless to say, Paskow-Cohen, like her father, grew up in a religious household. But unlike dad, she was a California kid of the 1960s.

“It was a lot different than living in a very Jewish home in New Jersey like my father did,” she said. “It was a different generation, with different experiences.”

Paskow-Cohen didn’t officially begin her rabbinical training until she had completed college. But she may have had a peak at the future during the 1976-1977 school year. It was then, during 10th grade, that she took a leave from Thousand Oaks High School to attend an orthodox, all-girls school in Israel.

“It was a very broadening experience to come from a small community like Thousand Oaks, a real suburbia-type place, to go to a school in Israel, where people came from all over the world,” she said. “It really laid the groundwork.”

That year, Paskow-Cohen learned fluent Hebrew, met Bedouins, lived with Israelis, and prayed at Biblical sites.

“We climbed Mt. Sinai,” she said. “We got up at 4 in the morning, before it was hot, to make the six-hour climb. And we took our prayer books and prayed at the top of the mountain.”

After graduating from high school, Paskow-Cohen enrolled at UCLA, where she included among her initial course load a class on Hebrew literature.

“I didn’t set out to be a rabbi. I didn’t set out to be a Hebrew major,” she said. “I took the class for interest. But the more classes I took, the more intriguing it was, and the more interesting it was.”

Soon, Paskow-Cohen was graduating with a degree in Hebrew literature. She followed that up with post-graduate work at the Hebrew University in Israel. “I realized I didn’t just want to be a professor,” she said. “But I did want to work to make Judaism more meaningful.”

Her next move was rabbinical school. Paskow-Cohen spent a year at the Hebrew University before applying to Hebrew Union College for the 1987-1988 academic year. She was ordained in 1989, on the 30th anniversary of her father’s ordination.

“It was an honor that my dad got to speak at my ordination,” she said.

Paskow-Cohen said that even as she was training to be a rabbi, she never felt at a disadvantage because of her gender.

A study published earlier this month by the American Jewish Congress’ Commission for Women’s Equality indicated that 54% of women rabbis had experienced some sexual discrimination on the job; 40% had heard derogatory comments about women made during classes or lectures at rabbinical school, and 48% had been asked “inappropriate questions,” during job interviews, about being women.

Paskow-Cohen said she has met with such obstacles on occasion, but they have not been the norm.

“I’ve had some nasty things said, or negative things said, in interviews--I think inadvertently,” she said. “But I’ve never had people say, “Well, you’re a woman so you’re not as good of a rabbi. People are usually pleased. They usually think its something refreshing, something new, and it’s a different perspective.”

And what does her father the rabbi think?

“My father always raised me saying I was capable of doing whatever I wanted to do,” she said, “that I could do it as well as a man.”

“Want to know how I feel about her?” Paskow asked. “I think she’s wonderful.”

QUOTABLE

As might be expected, rabbis Paskow and Paskow-Cohen have some pretty strong opinions. Here are some of their thoughts on certain timely topics:

* On recent progress toward peace between Israel and its Arab neighbors in the Middle East:

“We pray for peace and security for the Israeli people, and for the Palestinians among their own. . . . It will take a generation or more for the pain to lessen from both sides. There has been so much bloodshed and so many feelings hurt, but if we can move beyond that and try to look at positive things, and work together, I think we can make the world a much better place, especially in that region.”

Paskow-Cohen

*

“I have cautious optimism. I think it’s a good deal for everybody. Israel needs to have peace. They want to get rid of the Gaza anyway. And it’s good for the Palestinians. They need to uplift themselves. They can’t keep their people in poverty and oppressed. There are going to be many, many problems, but you have to start somewhere. This is a good beginning. If there is peace between Syria and Israel, it may be like a fulfillment of a Biblical prophecy from Isaiah where it says ‘in that day shall Israel be the third, with Egypt and with Assyria, a blessing in the midst of the earth.”

Paskow

*

On women in the rabbinate:

“In the liberal movement, we’ve made tremendous strides and have full equality, full acceptance. In the orthodox movement that’s a different issue, but then I’m not working in their community, and I’m not trying to change them either. That’s their community.”

Paskow-Cohen

*

“I think it’s very vital, very important for Jewish survival. We cannot ignore half of our population, so much skill and talent. Women have spiritual needs and they can make great contributions. We’ve had many outstanding women leaders in Jewish history. . . . I’m very proud. I did not try to talk my daughter into going into the rabbinate, that was her own decision. But what greater joy can a father have than his own daughter taking on the traditions and carrying on the heritage.”

Paskow

*

On hate crimes against the Jewish population:

“Education is always important. Not just education, but getting a chance to meet people. There are joint programs between Israeli kids and Palestinian kids. They could do the same here. There could be programs in the schools where they could talk about their different backgrounds. . . . I think if you meet people and get to know them you will be less likely to hate them for prejudiced reasons.”

Paskow-Cohen

*

“Though I strongly support separation of church and state, and I do not believe in bringing religion into the public schools, I do believe we should teach morals and ethics in the public school system. . . . Public education must put a greater emphasis on respecting everybody and helping other people, a greater emphasis on us all being responsible for each other, not to put others down but to help.”

Paskow