90’s FAMILY : GENERATIONS : Working It Out : Mom’s View

Juanita is the sweetest girl and I adore her. But she has one flaw that drives me crazy. She thinks she knows it all. She’s very stubborn and she doesn’t take a step back to observe what’s going on around her.

When my second daughter turned 15 recently, Juanita decided to plan the birthday party. She’s the type to take charge. They were supposed to have a small party in the back yard with 30 friends. They ended up with something else. There were 300 kids there. I almost died. My husband and I were in New York at the time. Luckily I asked my family to be at the party. My brother called the police, who peacefully broke it up.

But that’s Juanita. She thinks she knows it all, that you can invite 300 people to a party and it will still be peaceful. She just doesn’t listen to our experience and our advice. She thinks of short-term gratification.

I worked hard when I was growing up. I knew I had to go to college to get ahead. I knew I had to save money. Juanita knows she is going to college so there’s no planning there.

I’m a little worried. My husband and I were poor. Our parents always worked, but we just didn’t have everything we have now. But we had a certain richness in our lives. My immigrant parents came here with their work ethic. That was really something. Sometimes I think now we were lucky to be poor because it made us appreciate what we have now. Now we’re solidly middle class. I sometimes wonder if maybe my children have it too easy.

Juanita is very strong-willed. She’s a hard worker and very analytical. She’s always for the underdog. She enjoys debating, only I hate it when she debates with me. Now that I’m pregnant, I’m too tired. When I’m tired, Juanita wins.