The Apollo 11 earthwalk? That’s what Charles...

The Apollo 11 earthwalk? That’s what Charles Johnson of Lancaster calls it. He’s the proprietor of the 22-year-old Flat Earth Society, which has more than 3,000 dues-paying members stretching out to (but not peeking over) the four corners of the planet.

“The moonwalk was the greatest scientific hoax yet but the (25th) anniversary has been great for our society,” he said. “The scientific community’s claims have been so outrageous that a lot of turned-off people have joined us.”

Johnson, who publishes the Flat Earth News (subscription price: $25 per year), says the moonwalk was actually filmed around Meteor Crater in Arizona.

But if, as he says, the Earth is truly flat, are people in danger of falling off?

“That’s the question I’m always asked,” Johnson said with a chuckle. The answer, he said, is that no one has reached the edges. “We don’t know the dimensions of the world,” he said.

And up there in the skies? “We have little twinkling lights above us,” he said. “Who knows what they are?”

That’s one story the Flat Earth News doesn’t seem interested in.

*

Someone is watching over us: As we’ve mentioned, rumors have been circulating for months of back-seat angels panicking drivers with warnings of an impending quake.

We wonder if they might be affiliated with the hundreds of pink plaster seraphs that conceptual artist Jill D’Agnencia has been setting out around the city for our protection. The little character in this photo took a seat on Balboa Boulevard just after the Jan. 17 quake.

*

Poor butterfly: Viewers in Tulsa, Okla., were tuned in to the Three Tenors the other night when one Foul Mouth suddenly appeared.

A power failure broke the transmission for public TV station KOED, causing the signal to switch automatically to cable’s E! Entertainment channel. And Placido Domingo, Luciano Pavarotti and Jose Carreras gave way to Howard Stern.

The concert viewers were subjected to about six minutes of the shock jock’s show.

“Evidently, some very distasteful material aired . . . maybe even vulgar from the phone calls we received,” said Bob Allen, the head of KOED. “It had something to do with Howard Stern and people taking their pants off.”

*

Hey, Pasadena didn’t have all the excitement: “We, in Sierra Madre, can’t really compete with the glitter of Pasadena (and) the World Cup,” writes resident Kathleen Tobin. But, she points out, there have been some dramatic happenings recently, including one chronicled in the Police Blotter section of the Sierra Madre News:

“An auto rolled out of the service station across the street and jammed into Howie’s Market pickle section at Baldwin and Sierra Madre Boulevard.”

*

Flat-Foot Floogie Society: Regarding our item on the record album of 1940s lyrics, Esther Tarn of Culver City can’t understand how the publishers forgot to include “Flat-Foot Floogie (With a Floy-Floy).”

Such an omission is unforgivable. But we think they made up for it by including “Across the Alley From the Alamo,” “I’ve Got a Lovely Bunch of Coconuts” and “Cement Mixer (Put-Ti, Put-Ti).”

miscelLAny:

“Capricorn One,” which starred Elliot Gould, James Brolin and O.J. Simpson, was a 1978 movie about a moonwalk that was faked by the government. It’s a favorite of the Flat Earth Society.