THE GOODS : The Urge to Merge : A partnership isn’t easy. But it can work if you choose someone with complementary skills--and decide upfront if things will be strictly business.

For eight years, the two partners in a Brentwood business have resolved conflicts in joint visits to a clinical psychologist. The partners say the visits help them understand their values and make them more successful, says clinical psychologist Ronald Levine of Van Nuys.

“If they want to buy a piece of property, let’s say, one is far more conservative in his outlook on life. He needs to have every detail nailed down. The other wants to expand faster. He’s likely to have a different view of what constitutes a good buy.

“But they’re both outstanding businessmen and judging properties is very subjective. The issue isn’t the value of the property. It’s their personal values. My job is to make them aware of this. Then they talk about the real issue.”

The use of therapy highlights the difficult nature of business partnerships, which should be entered into carefully and can unravel easily.

Those forming partnerships should seek allies with similar values. Potential partners should decide what kind of relationship they want after business hours, write agreements spelling out their rights and duties, and learn to resolve conflicts quickly.

But before even becoming partners, they should find out if they “share the same values regarding relationships and the way they do business,” says Levine, who has counseled several business partners in recent years.

“I’d recommend they spend a day together outside of business, preferably with their families,” Levine says. “Families can see things you might not see. You’re ready to go into a business partnership that you think will make you king of the world. A family member can say, ‘Did you notice the way he treated his wife?’ He might treat you the same way.

“A lot of things can happen. How did she spend money? How does he drive? You get a sense of how a person is in the world.”

The potential partner should also seek a someone with complementary skills. “Where you are weak, the partner should be strong,” says USC business professor R. Mack Davis, who sold a partnership in a clothing business after 20 years.

“My partner’s strength was that he was a very good buyer and loved detail work. I was a great salesperson and loved working on the sales floor. We never got in conflicts because he didn’t want to sell and I didn’t want to buy.

“They did some research at Harvard on successful start-up businesses. It was amazing how many had what they called a creator and a driving force,” Davis says. “The creator developed the product and usually had the engineering or craft skills. The driving force went out and was the rainmaker and usually was a marketing, outgoing-type person.”

If there are conflicts, partners should clear the air quickly, says Barbara Korito, a partner in a Marina del Rey advertising agency. “It becomes an underlying current. It disturbs the course of business.”

If partners yell at each other and lack good conflict resolution skills, adds Lee Hausner, a Burbank clinical psychologist whose specialty is family businesses, “they need to bring in someone who can help teach them. That’s a very good use of a consultant.”

But even partners with similar values, complementary skills and a smooth business relationship can fail if they don’t clarify the kind of relationship they want outside work, Levine says.

“Do they want it to be strictly business? Do they want a social relationship where they go to dinner or go to movies? Are they looking for friendship--someone they can talk to about their intimate lives?

“It doesn’t matter which they want. But if one guy thinks he’s getting a friend, and his wife goes in for an operation and his partner doesn’t say anything, that can be trouble. If you know in advance what your partner’s like, you don’t expect anything and there’s less chance to get hurt feelings.”

Some prefer limits on how close partners can become. “There is a separation,” Korito says. “When it comes to the weekend, I don’t talk to my partner unless I have to, because I spend more time with him than he spends with his wife.”

After preliminary discussions about values and expectations, the partners should sign a written agreement.

“People who think they’re going into business and have an oral understanding will almost always come a cropper,” says Jon P. Goodman, director of the entrepreneur program in the school of business at USC.

“A key issue will be whether to incorporate, form a partnership or a limited liability company,” says Kent Graham, a partner at the O’Melveny & Myers law firm. “There are important business and tax aspects to each of those, and the parties need to consult an attorney and tax adviser.”

The document should spell out rights and duties, says Brentwood CPA Mel Poteshman, such as the division of work and profits and the rights of a partner who leaves.

Partnerships have some advantages over going it alone.

“One of the good things is that you have someone to discuss problems with,” Korito says. “If you have your own business, there’s no one you trust enough so you can air it.

“You also get to go on vacation because you have someone you can trust to take care of the business. It’s nice to share the responsibility of a business, which is enormous.”