Alias Pac Bell: You may recall that...

Alias Pac Bell: You may recall that Pac Bell announced last year it was personalizing its service by allowing directory assistance operators to identify themselves by their first names, instead of by numbers.

A neighborly gesture. Sort of.

A colleague phoned directory assistance the other day and, upon hearing the operator’s unusual name, innocently commented on it.

“Oh, it’s not my real name,” she confided. “None of us use our real names. It’s OK as long as we tell our supervisors.”

We phoned a Pac Bell spokesman, who expressed shock but promised to check it out.

He phoned back to say that, son of a gun, “some, but not all, (operators) use an alias,” either for reasons of privacy or because some have the same first name. If a caller “writes a commendation or voices a concern, we want to know who that person was speaking with,” he said.

We didn’t get the spokesman’s first name. But we think he said his last name was “Doe.”

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No bull: Paul Coker of Diamond Bar faxed us a message, advising us to check out crossword puzzle clue “57, Down” in Thursday’s Times.

It was: “-- happens.”

Four letters.

Now, shame on those of you who assume it would be an infamous bumper sticker slogan.

Actually, we figured out that the answer is “ITSOHAPPENS,” as it happens.

Unless we’re full of it.

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St. Patrick’s Day pinup: That’s Opal the Pug all gussied up there. Her photo was sent to us by Little Angels Pug Rescue, an L.A.-based, nonprofit group that rescues the breed from animal shelters. For a list of specific dogs or other animals that have been rescued, write HART, Breed Rescue Staff, P.O. Box 920, Fillmore, CA 93016-0920. Glamorous Opal is spoken for, by the way.

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Also in the spirit: Albert Navarro of West Covina, meanwhile, found a sign on a store that seems to have an Irish name. Unless it’s using an alias.

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Will Portland strike back now?El Segundo’s billboard attack on L.A. prompted us to recall a campaign that the non-mellow City of Angels launched two years ago against out-of-state cities trying to lure away Southland businesses.

Several scoreboard-type comparisons were posted around L.A., including: “Professional sports teams: Los Angeles 8, Portland 1.”

Of course, with the Dodgers and Angels on strike and the L.A./Anaheim Rams and the Raiders talking about moving, the score would be closer these days. Especially if you rule out the Clippers as a pro team.

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We’d hate to see you go Al, but . . .: Incidentally, if Raiders owner Al Davis follows through on threat No. 6,212 to leave L.A., there would be a positive side. You know how Mayor Riordan has pledged to put upward of 3,000 more police officers on the streets. Well, by eliminating Raiders games in the Coliseum, 50 to 100 L.A. police officers would be freed up to patrol L.A. on Sundays.

miscelLAny We’re not necessarily siding with critics who claim the Clinton Administration lacks direction. But The Times received a faxed cover sheet from the White House the other day that said: SUBJECT: PRESIDENT CLINTON SENDS A DELEGATION TO

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