Religion: Dialogue Between Church and Gays

I read with interest the article entitled “Opening the Door to Gays” [April 20], since I was one of the members mentioned who chose to leave the Claremont Methodist Church over the reconciliation issue.

Although I am an ardent admirer of Harry Pak, who was our minister at the time, there is one issue I don’t think he or the Claremont church makes clear. Not all of us chose to leave the church over the “gay issue.” In fact, several members were not at all concerned about the inclusion of gays in our worship service. Rather, it was the process that so astounded and hurt us.

Many of the gay supporters felt this was a matter of urgency and rushed what should have been an ongoing communication of information and concern into a somewhat militant stand against “all of those” who chose to discriminate. We were basically told at several meetings that reconciliation would go ahead with or without total consent, and should we have a problem with that we should leave.

I agree that a number of members debated the morality of homosexuality, but some of us, hoping to reach a compromise between those who insisted on becoming a reconciling congregation and those who insisted we not, had pleaded for more time. We simply wanted a chance to educate the church members. Instead, many of us were called names and personally attacked for our desire to allow the process to be part of the much-needed cultural awareness and dialogue within the Christian community.

It continues to hurt me deeply that even Rev. Pak was unable to see that there was a deeper concern than whether we become a reconciling church, and it was our concern that Claremont Methodist lose no one, gay or straight, to this issue.

It saddens me that the narrow-minded people who refuse to see gay people as part of God’s creation and love are paralleled by those who are equally prejudiced against those considered “anti-gay.” Such lack of concern for our fellow man happened on both sides of the fence at Claremont Methodist, and I continue to miss both our gay friends and those who left for religious and moral reasons.

I only wish that other congregations facing the same issue will take the time necessary to share and communicate effectively, without making either side feel pressured or demeaned for its stand.

JAN LAUREL JONES La Verne