Carl A. Faber; Psychologist, UCLA Educator

Carl Alexander Faber, popular psychologist and UCLA educator who wrote a book about relationships titled “On Listening,” has died. He was 60.

Faber died Monday at St. John’s Hospital in Santa Monica of non-Hodgkins lymphoma, his daughter, Jollee, said Wednesday.

In private practice in Westwood for more than 30 years, Faber lectured widely and taught classes intermittently at UCLA. Among his popular courses was a six-week lecture series for UCLA Extension in the summer of 1969 titled “Man and Life in the 20th Century.” Topics included conflict between mothers and daughters and fathers and sons and dealing with ethical dilemmas in the modern world.

Throughout his career, Faber was candid in his criticism of parenting, religion, sexual freedom and psychotherapy.

“Hurt and disappointment are universal things,” he told The Times during one series of lectures on withdrawal.

“What happens is that at some place along the line, either because of vulnerability, inadequate parenting, which almost all of us have had, or ignorance of living, we stop reacting. . . . We experience all our emotions through hurt, jealousy, anger. Withdrawal is more than a mechanism; it becomes the life of most adults. Most adults don’t really like their lives.”

Faber frequently testified at court trials, particularly on the subject of depression.

In addition to his book on relationships, he wrote a volume of poetry.

Born in Eagle Rock, Faber earned his degrees at UCLA and studied at Fuller Seminary in Pasadena and the Jung Institute in Switzerland.

In addition to his daughter, Faber is survived by three sons, Eric, Seth and Carl, two granddaughters, and his companion, Kathryn Ballsun.

Services are scheduled for 3 p.m. Saturday at St. Augustine-by-the-Sea Episcopal Church in Santa Monica.