Group Offers Help in Coping With Grief

A new support group that begins meeting tonight offers the bereaved something they may find is in short supply: a little understanding.

“I hear a lot that co-workers expect these people to be back and functioning within three weeks and they’re just coming out of shock,” said the Rev. Joy Samuels, a family therapist. “To think someone is going to be fully functioning within a year of a loved one’s death is absurd. And often no one has given them the permission to say this is the worst thing that has happened in their life.”

Growing Through Grief, an eight-week educational and support group for adults, first meets tonight at St. John’s Regional Medical Center. The first session is open to anyone interested in finding out more about the group and whether it might benefit them.

“People will probably need to attend if they’ve experienced a major death within the last year, be it a co-worker, spouse, infant or extended family member,” said Samuels. “I think we do a good job of balancing and of giving people enough information to understand what it is they’re experiencing and letting them have a voice in that experience.”

Homework assignments, such as writing in a journal or cleaning out a loved one’s closet, are given and then discussed the following week.

At the end of the eight weeks, Samuels said, most people have developed the skills necessary to deal with their grief.

“They’re not only at a better place,” she said, “but they know how to self-assess and know when they’re in over their heads and should call a friend or take better care of themselves.”

The group will meet from 5 to 6:30 p.m. Tuesdays for eight weeks beginning this evening at St. John’s Regional Medical Center in Oxnard, 1600 N. Rose Ave. The sessions are free.