Some Resolutions for a New Holiday Season

The holiday season is upon us again. I’m cringing at the media blitz that accompanies it, especially since my husband and I want to instill in our 4-year-old daughter values beyond those that flash across the television screen every five to 10 minutes. This leads me to Holiday Principle No. 1: Keep the television off and avoid advertisements. Who isn’t enticed by all the pretty things--from decorations to refreshments to every kind of toy imaginable?

Here’s Principle No. 2: Buy less. Better yet, make gifts. Friends and relatives will appreciate that batch of homemade cookies or fudge. Framed art from your children is another idea. Or get the children to help make and decorate Christmas ornaments. Photo albums with amusing captions make an original, and memorable, gift. No time, you say? Start in July. I read where a congregation decided that each family would spend no more than $100 on presents. Maybe we’ll shoot for that next year.

Principle No. 3: Focus on the meaning of the season. Whatever you believe, look beyond the gift-buying frenzy to what lies beneath. Our consumer society would like us to charge till we drop. But let’s remember, Christmas is the celebration of the birth of Jesus Christ. Hanukkah commemorates the rededication of the temple in Jerusalem that was reclaimed from foreign hands. Kwanzaa honors such principles as faith, unity and responsibility--in contrast to shop, spend and accumulate.

Principle No. 4: Give something back. This principle made me think. Give what? And to whom? In years past, we’ve donated toys and cans of food to needy families. This year, I wanted to do more and help my daughter learn the true spirit of the season, so we volunteered to help serve Thanksgiving dinner to the members of an adult day health care center. My heart swelled as I watched Juliana, in her Christmas dress and favorite red bow, side by side with a little boy, wheel the metal food cart around the tables. “All by myself, Mom,” she said. Then the children pulled out the trayfuls of dinner and carefully set each in front of the hungry diners. After, my daughter tossed a beach ball around with the participants, tinkled the keys of a nearby piano and helped a lady roll up her skein of yarn.

My heart warmed even more the following week when we escorted our senior friends in wheelchairs as they Christmas shopped at the Laguna Hills Mall. I was worried that my daughter would get restless, wanting to check out the wonders of the season, and of the toy store. To my relief, she cheerfully sat on our new friend Dorothy’s lap the whole time as I pushed them around the mall.

Principle No. 5: Throw out your New Year’s resolutions. Who really follows that tired old list of should-dos? We are so caught up in everyday life--inundated with computers, faxes and cell phones--that we lose sight of how it’s only in the present that we live fully.

As you’re hurrying to the next meeting, luncheon or after-school soccer game, take time to breathe deeply and absorb what’s around you. When was the last time you noticed the palm trees you drive by every day on your way to work, or how vivid blue the sky becomes on our blustery winter days? When did you last sit and leisurely read a book to your child? Or take off your shoes and walk along the beach? When was the last time you told those dear to you that you love them?

And here’s my last principle, No. 6, however cliche: Be thankful for your blessings. Most of us have loved ones around us, a warm place to sleep and food to fill our stomachs. Most of us are healthy. Some of us aren’t so fortunate. At the time of this writing, my beautiful sister-in-law, Linda Bersie of Antioch, Ill., lost her battle with cancer. Our time here is short, a grain of sand on the beach of infinity. So whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or any other tradition, appreciate and enjoy what you have, and give something back, even if it’s a smile and a “thank you” to a tired store clerk.

Peace, and Happy New Year too.