Gilding the Cake

I know it’ll break Martha Stewart’s heart, but I’m one girl who hasn’t spent her whole life planning her dream wedding. Sure, the thought has come up every once in a while, especially since Mom’s wedding dress has been lying in wait for the day when I, her only daughter, will live out her--I mean, my--life’s ambition.

But, in truth, I was a happily independent woman in my early 30s, pretty much certain that a wedding wouldn’t be in my plans, when I found myself sporting an engagement ring about a year ago. Suddenly, visions of bouquets and bridesmaids were dancing in my head. How about that dream wedding? An event fit for the royal personage I’ve unexpectedly become? Nuptials to rival Princess Di’s?

“If someone tells me the sky’s the limit, they’d better mean it,” says Carolyn Baer, a catering wedding specialist at Cheers. Located in Northridge, Cheers is known to many in the trade, and Baer seems to know it all when it comes to weddings.

She tells me that my first consideration for the fantasy jubilee is location, location, location. “I specialize in finding locations, many of which are high-end, private estates,” she says. “Hotels and established locations are beautiful, but today many people want something different, some freedom, some way to make their wedding really their own.”

The list of over 150 estates available for weddings includes seaside manors in Malibu, Art Deco mansions in Beverly Hills and rustic villas in Chatsworth. Although there are plenty available from $5,000 to $10,000, the average price for this kind of swank location is $25,000.

Baer stresses that these elegant private homes are an ideal choice for a couple looking for an intimate, distinctive setting. Although they range in size, the interiors generally won’t hold more than 100--sometimes only 50--guests, and in most cases the weddings and receptions are held outdoors in gardens or on tennis courts.

Yes, you are in someone else’s backyard, but according to Baer, “We make it as easy as walking into a hotel--there are no details that will be left to the bride and groom.”

Oh, those pesky details.

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Like many caterers and wedding coordinators today, Baer can be as involved in the planning stages as you want her to be. Of course, each detail costs money. But she will gladly and expertly handle every aspect of a wedding reception, from flowers to favors to photography and, of course, food.

“We create a menu that is customized in every detail, sometimes even creating or duplicating favorite dishes for a wedding,” she says. “There are very few things that our kitchen can’t prepare. We do fabulous Cajun.”

So how much for an upscale party for, say, 150 guests--the average-size wedding nowadays? Just for the reception, start at $35,000 and work upward.

But maybe I want to go all out and do something completely different--a unique, theatrical wedding with an edge, and a creative mind to tackle the whole adventure.

“I don’t know if there’s anything we don’t do,” says Deirdre Sullivan of Deirdre Sullivan Catering and Event Planning. Sullivan catering has an in-house florist as well as a kitchen, and prides itself on personalizing every aspect of a wedding including the ceremony, building props, scenery and even sometimes creating the wedding gown. “With us there’s no such thing as a generic wedding,” Sullivan says.

At a recent wedding for a couple from Texas, the site was a Malibu ranch, the flowers primarily yellow roses, the entree T-bone steaks. “They had a traditional wedding cake, but the groom’s cake was decorated with small, black-and-white cows. And when the bride wanted a dress like Scarlett O’Hara, we built it from scratch.”

Sullivan’s personal, hands-on touch seems to have paid off for her relatively new company, a wild success after only two years. “I become a part of the whole event,” she says. “We try to make each party better than the last, and I personally get so involved that a bride-to-be can call me at 4 in the morning, crying about her mother-in-law.”

Hmmm. Tears, over a wedding? Sounds frighteningly prophetic in my case, especially with a no-holds-barred wedding by Sullivan running an average of $75,000.

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Very soon in my investigating, I run into Tobey Dodge, called “wedding coordinator extraordinaire,” by the Southland’s wedding planning bible, “Here Comes the Guide” (Hopscotch Press, 1996).

With 10 years of experience, she’s truly made bridal hand-holding an art. “Most caterers do a certain amount of wedding planning,” Dodge confided to me, “but how many are able, willing and want to deal with topics such as mothers not wanting to wear a certain color of dress or someone losing their tux the morning of?”

She’s an expert at tying up loose ends, matching vendors to clients, and foreseeing and addressing any and all concerns and problems that come up during the nine months that nuptials ideally take to gestate (although a premature wedding is often healthy after only six).

She’s also one of the easiest people in the world to talk to. One call to her and I’m convinced that there’s nothing she can’t handle. Rise to the challenge of an imaginary royal wedding? She’d be delighted to take out all the stops.

Her location for my fantasy nuptials: The place is Sherwood Country Club, located in a gated community near Thousand Oaks. Dodge describes it as “classically beautiful, brick and Southern colonial.” As the guests arrive up the winding drive--to valet service, of course--they are greeted with champagne, the servers in tails, wearing white gloves. Holding handsome invitations printed on gilt-edged rice paper pressed with dried flowers (Robin Caroll Stationery), friends and family are led to the outdoor area where the ceremony will take place.

The graceful colonnade and gardens are decorated with flowering vines and lavish yet tasteful arrangements (Mark’s Garden of Sherman Oaks). A classical string quartet plays strains of Brahms and Mozart until a row of costumed trumpeters begins a fanfare, announcing the arrival of the bride (me) in a horse-drawn carriage.

I am wearing a couture gown of diamond white organza with a satin top decorated with hand-made organza flowers; my bridesmaids and flower girls are dressed in Watters and Watters gowns (Euphoria, A Special Bridal Salon).

The wedding party assembles. The men look absolutely smashing in their classic tuxedos (Le Tux in North Hollywood), especially the groom. A striking, incredibly warm woman performs the ceremony (the Rev. Kimber Lee Wilkes); it’s as if she’s known us all our lives and her heartfelt words bring everyone to tears.

Finally, the cherubic ring-bearer brings forward our wedding bands on a hand-made lace pillow (Encino’s Bridal Essentials). And as the bride (me, again) is kissed (by my now-husband) a flock of doves are released.

It is now cocktail hour, with martinis and single-malt scotch passed with the trays of hors d’oeuvres. Before we go inside to the formal dining room, guests pick up their place cards, which are in engraved silver frames.

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During our gourmet dinner a full orchestra plays, and after dinner there is dancing on aged cherrywood floors, dessert, throwing of bouquets and garters (mine), and more cocktails as we toast and toast again.

The whole event lasts a minimum of six or seven hours--depending, says Tobey, upon the number of toasts. And Tobey, herself, has been there for at least 10 hours, supervising make-up and hair designers, orchestrating all of the service providers and the in-house caterer, going over the timing of critical events. She has also been overseeing the photo sessions (Valerie Smith Photography), the first of which took place at various locations around the grounds hours before the guests arrived.

But now the clock strikes midnight, and from behind the full moon comes a helicopter, which quickly whisks away the newly married couple (us) off to a honeymoon and new life together. My mother has never been happier. So what is my price tag now?

With no trouble at all, it could easily reach $150,000.