Why I Protected My Kids From the ‘Cussing Canoer’

In Nov. 9, 1991, I was blessed with a healthy baby boy. Dalton was his daddy’s pride and joy, and his birth forever changed my life. Our son Casey came along 21 months after and, on May 18, 1996, we had Samantha, the sweetest little thing a daddy could ever ask for. I had real responsibilities now. Determined to be the best dad that I could, I dug deep into my childhood memories for answers.

I can clearly recall how my parents gave me and my siblings unconditional love. We were praised when we did good things and punished when we did those not-so-good things. But one thing was always certain: Mom and dad never bailed us out; we always had to suffer the consequences of our actions.

Everyone says that raising kids in the ‘90s is much more difficult than it was in the ‘60s and ‘70s. I know I am constantly on the lookout for things that I don’t want my children exposed to. This is virtually an impossible task. With so much chaos and negativity in our world, all I can do is monitor their movements and try to protect them. They will learn in due time what the world is all about, so why would I let them become embittered and desensitized at such an innocent time in their lives?

Little did I know just how difficult it really is to shield my children until the incident on Aug. 15, 1998. This is the day that Timothy Boomer, the infamous “cussing canoer,” fell into our lives. We were on a family outing, and there he was in the middle of the river screaming the f-word over and over after his canoe capsized. My wife covered Samantha’s ears, but poor little Casey had no choice but to listen.

What was I to do? Risk a fight with Mr. River Rage or paddle away as fast as I could? Using the better part of discretion, I chose the latter.

This man received a citation for obscene language from a river patrol police officer. Even though his language was quite vulgar, I did not ask that Boomer be ticketed for swearing in front of my children. I was approached by the officer and asked to be a witness.

Since then, I have had to testify in court and my face has been plastered on every television set in the country, repeating the cussing canoer’s words. Not quite the way I would have liked to gain notoriety, but I guess it sends a message that there are people who are fed up with these self-centered attitudes.

As most of the world probably knows, Boomer was convicted June 11 of violating an 1897 ban on swearing in front of children.

Do I feel vindicated? No, not exactly.

If Boomer would have simply sent a letter of apology or called to apologize, I wouldn’t have even testified against him. To this day, there has been no apology.

I am quite sure that Boomer really is a decent person who, like every decent person at some point in their lives, messed up and got caught doing something stupid. The trick is to grow from situations like this. These are the lessons that shape a person’s character.

I forgive Boomer for what he did. In fact, if he has to do community service and doesn’t have a problem with this, I would like to offer to take a trip with him down the Rifle River and share in helping clean things up.

Without a doubt, this incident has left a profound impact on my life as a parent. I will continue to always lead my children by example and show them that it is a good thing to respect others and to be strong and stand up for what is right.