What Do Elvis, Hitler and Gandhi Have in Common?

So, have you heard about Time magazine’s dilemma in trying to figure out which human being’s face should appear on its beginning of 2000 cover to be immortalized as the Person of the Century?

No?

Well, brace yourself.

It might be (gulp) Adolf Hitler.

More a being than a human, Hitler was once the magazine’s Man of the Year and is one of the leading contenders to be voted the most influential figure of the 1900s.

Last I heard, the three top vote-getters in a Web site poll being conducted by Time were--brace yourself again--Elvis Presley, Hitler and Mohandas K. Gandhi, in that order.

(A trio with absolutely nothing else in common, to the best of my knowledge.)

The King, the Fuehrer and the Mahatma.

I don’t know about you, but I’m having a heck of a time making up my mind. How do I choose between--taking the candidates in reverse order--a man who personified nonviolence, a man who personified hate and a man who sang the words, “You ain’t nothin’ but a hound dog?”

Readers, help me out here.

I need to hear from you. Give me your choice or your alternative choice. Just no nominating Joey Buttafuoco, Squeaky Fromme, Alfred E. Neuman, Tiny Tim, Linda Lovelace, John Wayne Bobbitt, Dilbert, Barbie, Secretariat, Xena the Warrior Princess or newspaper columnists whose names begin with the letter D.

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A Web editor at Time said that as of last week, more than 23 million suggestions had been made for Person of the Century.

There is no use “stuffing the ballot box” for your favorite, because this is a poll, not an election. Survey results will be taken under advisement, but Time’s editors will make the final call. They are merely looking for reader feedback.

(At https://www.time.com)

I can tell you this about what kind of feedback Time’s readers have been feeding back:

Hitler is getting thumbs down.

As soon as it became apparent that the person designated as Person of the Century could turn out to be the worst person of the century, readers really got riled. They are letting Time know that they are opposed to the designated Hitler.

The trouble is that a Person of the Year is not necessarily a nice person.

This is not a good guy award. It is not a testimonial. Time is not out to tell the world that what Adolf Hitler did is more distinguished than what Franklin D. Roosevelt did. Or what Henry Ford did. Or what Mother Teresa did.

The magazine is merely looking to single out the single most dominant presence of the 20th Century.

A person who made history.

A person who rocked the world.

A person who cannot be ignored.

Now, I know that a lot of you out there are thinking the exact same thing that I’ve been thinking:

Elvis Presley?

A guitar-playing, hip-swaying, hair-spraying, ain’t-saying singer as the most influential individual of 100 years?

I knew E was big. But man, I never knew he was this big.

Hitler murdered millions of people, overthrew nations and made an attempt to rule the Earth.

Gandhi brought people together and made great personal sacrifices to promote peace.

Elvis sang “Viva Las Vegas.”

It just goes to show you, what do I know about what it takes to become Person of the Century? I mean, what if Elvis wins? What will the editors of Time do if Presley beats out Hitler and Gandhi by a landslide in their poll?

(And by the way, who’s going to finish fourth . . . Chuck Berry?)

In voting that I believe will be accepted until November, the magazine is actually looking to determine the 100 Most Influential People of the Century.

I can already guess some of the names we’ll be seeing . . . Kennedy, King, De Gaulle, Lenin, Franco, Hirohito, Mao, Eisenhower, Elizabeth, Lindbergh, Picasso, Gershwin, Salk, Rickenbacker, Hoover, Ruth, Pele, Jordan, in no discernible order.

John Wayne, Joe Louis, Louis Armstrong, Neil Armstrong, Nixon, Stalin, Marx, Lennon and McCartney . . . you tell me.

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I may just run my own poll.

Voters can nominate to me their personal choices for person of the century. Then I will personally veto the voters’ choices and vote in my own.

It is OK to vote for Hitler if you must, but you must also remember to include the words: “He ain’t nothin’ but a hound dog.”

This won’t be easy: Elvis or Adolf.

So take your time. I promise not to reveal your reasons, unless they’re really bad reasons.

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Mike Downey’s column appears Sundays, Wednesdays and Fridays. Write to him at Times Mirror Square, Los Angeles 90053. E-mail: mike.downey@latimes.com