We’ll Get Around to Writing a Headline Later

This article was originally supposed to appear at the beginning of National Procrastination Week, which started March 1, but I didn’t think that adequately conveyed the spirit of the celebration.

So I got busy clipping my nails, rearranging the doodads on my desk and organizing a pile of paper clips into an artistic pattern. Then I suggested to my editor it would actually be funnier to run this article in June. She didn’t buy it--especially since other reporters had missed their deadlines and no substitute stories were available.

Needless to say, this forced me to spend the next few days taking long lunches, sending e-mail, clipping my nails again and engaging in heavy philosophical debates with colleagues over whether Miller beer tastes great or is less filling. I also had to reorganize my desk a few times.

At the last minute, I decided to call the Pennsylvania-based Procrastinators’ Club of America, which sponsors National Procrastination Week. But then I realized they wouldn’t return my call in time.