His Charisma Still Needs Some Work

Brian Doogan of the London Express writes that heavyweight champion Lennox Lewis plans to fight all over the world in the fashion of Muhammad Ali.

“Fights in Malaysia, the Philippines and most memorably in Zaire helped make Ali’s pretty face the best known on earth and Team Lewis is now set to project its champion to the entire world, not to limit his appearances to the seedy casino turns of the United States. . . .

“Trainer Emanuel Steward said his man should one day be able to stand comparison with men of the status of Ali, Joe Louis and Jack Johnson, standard bearers of a proud and illustrious lineage Lewis will carry into the 21st century.

“Said Lewis: ‘I am among the greatest of the greatest and will set some new goals and accomplish those.’ ”

Well, at least he sounds like Ali.

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Trivia time: Who holds the NCAA Division 1-A record for touchdown passes in a season?

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Look for it: Jeff Gordon in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch: “Now that the NFL has banned the throat-slashing gesture popular among celebrating players, will the athletes use the pull-the-pin, toss-the-grenade taunts instead?”

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Just too good: CBS sports analyst David Feherty, on Tiger Woods: “They pay appearance money in Europe. I’m starting to think they should pay disappearance money here. Maybe get him to go somewhere else.”

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Wayne’s world: Ron Rapoport in the Chicago Sun-Times: “The bravest man in Canada has to be Chris Stevenson of the Ottawa Sun, who, on the day Wayne Gretzky’s Hall of Fame induction ceremonies all but brought the country to a halt, said the overkill was getting to him and he hardly could blame some critics for saying, ‘Retire already.’ ”

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FYI: Headline in the New York Daily News after the Clippers beat the New York Knicks, 100-95, on Tuesday: “Clip Wreck.”

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It can only get worse: Golden State Warrior guard Damon Jones, commenting to the San Francisco Chronicle on the team’s 2-8 record:

“We’re a bunch of individuals right now. I sit over there [on the bench] and see no excitement or enthusiasm. It’s baffling to sit there and watch it unfold that way.”

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Big continent: Bernie Lincicome of the Chicago Tribune says that Brad Millard, the 7-foot-3, 345-pound center from St. Mary’s “makes Bryant ‘Big Country’ Reeves look like Andorra.”

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Trivia answer: David Klingler of Houston, 54 in 1990.

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And finally: South Carolina Coach Lou Holtz, on his team finishing with an 0-11 record: “We don’t want self-pity. We are not going to stay where we are.”

It can’t get any worse, Lou, or can it?