We All Script Our Own Characters

You gotta love the obscure national days and weeks that we celebrate in this country: National Eat What You Want Day (May 11) could be my favorite, followed closely by National Thanks for All the Gifts Week (the third week in August) and National Grouch Day (Oct. 15).

Well, Sunday is National Handwriting Day (in honor of John Hancock, born Jan. 23, 1737).

I’ve never understood how handwriting could reveal much about one’s personality, except sloppiness perhaps. But Rose Matousek, president of the Illinois-based American Assn. of Handwriting Analysts, insists the way we cross our t’s and dot our i’s is a window into the soul that can be opened to help determine an ideal career, marriage compatibility and more.

Large writing is the mark of an extrovert and small writing the mark of an introvert, she said. If your handwriting is rounded and flowing as opposed to angular, you are a person who thinks from your heart, not your head.

“The page is like a room, so if the margins are wide, you may be a person who avoids contact.” If you cover the entire page when you write, you are a person who likes to be involved with other people, Matousek said.

I was so out of practice when I put pen to paper to form cursive letters, my hand actually cramped. I managed to crank out a few short paragraphs to fax to Matousek. I was convinced she wasn’t going to read me like an open book.

But after just a few minutes of analysis, she knew a surprising (and flattering) amount about me. I’m logical, she said, because every letter in each word of my handwriting is connected. I hold on to the things that have upset me because my left margin moves to the left, indicating I don’t let go. And, she said, because my signature is identical to my handwriting (instead of a froufrou practiced thing), I am honest.

“A signature is a psychological calling card to the world,” she said, “Yours indicates a what-you-see-is-what-you-get attitude.”’

Excellent. That’s what I was going for.

In our computer age, said Matousek, handwriting analysis is a dying art. “But cursive is important because it exercises the brain’s powers, improves sequential thinking and reading ability.”

Thanks anyway, but I’m sticking to my computer. It’s a heck of a lot easier (and my pen doesn’t have spell-check).

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For whom the bells toll--the wedding bells, that is--Soolip Paperie and Press (which specializes in invitations and other printed matter) is hosting a wedding fair Sunday. The West Hollywood store has organized a fashion show of gowns by Richard Tyler, cosmetics by Stila, cake by Sweet Lady Jane, flowers by Velvet Garden, jewelry by Philip Press and lots of other goodies. Brunch is included and there are two seatings, at 10 a.m. and 2 p.m., at the Women’s Club of Hollywood, 1749 La Brea Ave. For tickets ($45), call (310) 360-0545.

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Wireless Flash News Service reports that Wolford, an Austrian hosiery manufacturer, is putting men in tights.

The company’s new “Waistsock” is similar to the woolies women wear in winter. Toni Lazarro, a spokeswoman for Wolford, said the company designed the men’s tights ($32 to $90; at Wolford stores in South Coast Plaza and Beverly Hills) in response to requests from both men and women. “Women were telling us their husbands were borrowing their tights and men were telling us they wanted to wear them for warmth.”

I always did have a thing for Mikhail Baryshnikov. Must be the tights.