Even in the Gym, One Must Mind One’s Manners

My friend Jackie and I were at the health club the other day waiting for our yoga class to begin. As the instructor began leading our breathing exercises, a woman popped into class, plopped her yoga mat about two inches in front of me, and went right into her exercises.

Jackie looked at me and rolled her eyes. We both thought: rude! After class, Jackie said, “I’m not surprised. There are no manners in this gym.” We laughed, and then took action: We wrote up a long wish list of “etiquette rules” and placed it in the gym’s suggestion box.

*

There’s no doubt that today’s new technology and changing lifestyles have introduced situations that Emily Post would never have imagined. But one sign of how times have changed is the fact that the latest edition of “Emily Post’s Etiquette” (the definitive guide to etiquette, now written by great-granddaughter-in-law Peggy Post) devotes an entire chapter to proper behavior in the gym.

For example, Post’s book offers the following advice on locker room conduct: “Don’t take 30-minute showers.” And “even if you’re the uninhibited type, don’t walk around the dressing room without clothes on.” Perhaps I’ll slip a copy of Post’s book beside the locker of a woman in my gym who has the confidence to stand naked in front of the mirror while she dries her hair, does her make-up and makes cellular phone calls to her office.

After many years of teaching exercise classes and as a fitness instructor at some of the country’s leading health clubs, I have a few suggestions for polite conduct in the gym. Some of these tips are geared toward members, while others are aimed at gym management:

1. Basic dress code. I’m all for fashion, but there ought to be some limits. During a recent Bikram yoga class (a rigorous style sometimes referred to as “hot yoga,” where one exercises in a room heated to 100 degrees), I and other students became uncomfortable when a couple showed up inappropriately attired (he wore a Speedo and she sported a bikini). In popular yoga and stretch classes, people often must exercise in close proximity--and may prefer not to get a close-up view of their neighbors’ anatomy. My recommendation for appropriate attire for men is shorts or yoga pants and a comfortable T-shirt. Women should wear long or short tights, and a relaxed but modest top.

2. Leave your cell phones in the locker room. I’ve seen New York fitness trainers looking helpless as clients traded stocks on their cell phones in the middle of a sit-up routine. (Perhaps the L.A. version would be Hollywood agents deal-making in the middle of Spinning class.) But let’s face it, nobody in the weight room really wants to listen to your phone conversations.

3. Children don’t belong in exercise class. I can sympathize with the parent whose baby-sitter cancels at the last minute. But I’ve heard too many stories about little fingers getting caught in bike wheels, or runaway treadmills with kids on them, to ever advocate the presence of young children in an adult gym. And gyms should do their part by offering affordable, quality child care.

4. Gym owners: Please don’t push pills, potions and other products on your members. The gym is a great place to meet people and even make friends and business contacts. However, it’s just plain tacky to have to listen to a sales pitch for the latest gadget or magic “pump you up” pill between sets in the weight room.

5. Don’t be a weight room bench-hog. If the gym is crowded, other people may ask to “work in” with you. This means you and someone else will take turns doing a set of repetitions. Just make sure you ask permission to “work in” with someone before you plop down on the bench. And please return weights or dumbbells to their proper space on the rack.

6. Spread a towel out on a bench before you sit or lie on it. Wipe sweat off the equipment, mat or bench when you’re done.

7. Many gyms post signs limiting the use of the cardio equipment to 30 minutes per person. I admit I’m sometimes guilty of pushing my time to 35 or 40 minutes when I think nobody cares. The truth is, someone was probably waiting for their turn on the treadmill. I’ll sign up and wait my turn--and stick to the allotted time--if you will.

8. Think twice before correcting someone on their exercise routine. Even if your intentions are honorable, uninvited advice may lead to confrontations. If you think someone is risking injury, alert the gym’s staff. Or you might ask a question to see if someone is open to your advice: For example, “May I show you another way to do that?” If the answer is something like, “You don’t look like Arnold Schwarzenegger to me!,” make haste for the opposite side of the room.

Finally, the close quarters of a crowded gym can pose difficult situations. Among other reasons, we come to the gym to help unload the stress of our lives, not add to it. Don’t hesitate to request a little consideration for yourself. And bear in mind that your own courteous behavior can be contagious.

*

Stephanie Oakes is the fitness correspondent for Discovery Health Channel. She can be reached by e-mail at stephoakes@aol.com. Her column appears the fourth Monday of each month.