Water May Signify Unresolved Feelings

Dear Cynthia: My wife has recurring dreams in which she is very anxious. Water is always involved in these dreams. There is either rising water surrounding her or water blocking her path. I thought water was supposed to be about cleansing and healing; this water seems so threatening to her.

--J.R.

Northridge

Dear J.R.: Water can be whatever the dreamer associates with it, which is the very nature of dreams. But there are archetypal or universal associations. Water is often a symbol of emotion. Think of common speech, such as, “Here come the waterworks!” when a person is about to cry. The water surrounding your wife could be emotions and feelings that she is uncomfortable with and which she isn’t expressing in her waking state.

Hence, they surround her in her dreams, perhaps a subconscious effort to encourage her to face her feelings and express them. The water blocking her path again may indicate that her feelings, or, more likely, not dealing with her feelings, has become an obstacle preventing her from moving forward on her life path.

Anxiety is fear of the future. If your wife is a woman who holds things in, keeping her feelings to herself, her subconscious mind may be prodding her to face the fear and express herself. The way to true happiness and to personal growth is to recognize how we feel and to be able to express these feelings.

Many women worry about hurting the feelings of others, and would rather hold in their emotions to create smooth sailing for family and friends. Others seem to take this awareness as a license to say “their truth” and use the expression of feelings in destructive and manipulative ways.

Perhaps you could encourage your wife to get in touch with her feelings by keeping a journal. She should begin and end the day recording what she’s feeling. Then you could make it safe for her to start sharing more by asking about her feelings, and not judging her answer. You can also encourage her to express feelings by sharing yours with her; this could create a new level of intimacy between you.

Cynthia Richmond is the author of “Dream Power, How to Use Your Night Dreams to Change Your Life” (Simon & Schuster, 2000). Fax your dreams to Cynthia Richmond at (818) 783-3267 or e-mail them to in.your.dreams@worldnet.att.net. Please include your hometown and a daytime phone number. “In Your Dreams” appears every Tuesday and should be read for entertainment purposes only.