‘Stabbing’ Represents Unresolved Anger
Dear Cynthia: I am angry with my daughter’s father, but we are trying to work things out. I don’t like being around him, but I don’t wish him harm. In my dream, I am sitting with my feet in a pool; my daughter is on my lap. She looks a couple of years younger than she is now. I see her dad across the pool sitting with another woman. I don’t feel anything: no anger, no jealousy, nothing. Then the girl says something about my daughter, and suddenly I am furious. I try to get her father to leave with me right then, but he refuses. I yell and cuss, and then I have a knife in my hand. (I can actually feel it.) I stab him in the stomach, and then I stab him all over until I am sure that he is dead. Then I pick up my daughter and we leave. Please tell me it does not mean that I want him dead.
--NIGHTMARE IN PASADENA
Dear Reader: Yours is a dream of repressed, unresolved anger. It does not mean that you want your daughter’s father to die. It does indicate that you are still very angry with him, even though you say that you are working on your relationship.
You don’t say why you are angry with him, but in the dream, you feel betrayed by the comments of someone close to him and by his refusal to leave her behind and choose to go with you.
If there has been a betrayal in your real life with him, this would certainly all make sense. Because your daughter is younger in the dream, maybe her age is a time clue for when you began to feel discontent with your daughter’s father. Is this when he started to make you angry with his behavior?
You need to get very clear about how you actually feel and what you want from this relationship. I believe you need to tell him your feelings and ask for what you want.
If he can’t give you what you want and need, then you may have to change the nature of the relationship. But you can’t live happily ever after with anger and resentment; they will make your life miserable.
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Cynthia Richmond is the author of “Dream Power, How to Use Your Night Dreams to Change Your Life” (Simon & Schuster, 2000). Fax your dreams to Cynthia Richmond at (818) 783-3267 or e-mail them to in.your.dreams@worldnet.att.net. Please include your hometown and a daytime phone number. “In Your Dreams” appears every Tuesday and should be read for entertainment purposes only.