Lakers’ Momentum Fits Shaq to a T

From Hack-a-Shaq to designated technical foul shooter. You’ve come a long way, baby.

P.J. GENDEL

Beverly Hills

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Scottie Pippen must be very jealous of the Lakers. First, they steal Big Chief Triangle from him, and then they have the audacity to win a championship without him! Oh, the nerve of those Lakers. And what’s worse, the Lakers are going to sign Michael Jordan in the off-season, which will lead to some downright unfair basketball. Pippen will be stuck in purgatory with his pouting Trail Blazer friends.

BEN SEVERSON

Long Beach

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Shaq’s too big! Shaq stays in the lane too long! Wah, Wah, Wah. The Portland Trail Failures are pathetic. This is the NBA, gentlemen. Its professional basketball. Beat the Lakers or be beaten. Just don’t whine anymore about it. If you score more points than the other team you win. It’s that simple.

RON TURNER

Lancaster

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In the NBA, the Eastern Conference has the Philadelphia 76ers and the Western Conference has the Portland 75ers, a team that is capable of playing only three quarters.

TOM FLORES

Santa Monica