Look Past the Stereotypes to See Teen Girls as They Are
Re “Girl Trouble,” Opinion, Aug. 25: Kudos to Karen Stabiner for voicing the thoughts of many teen girls. I am a female teenager and so are many of my friends. Contrary to what seems to be the general opinion, we are quite happy with ourselves. The reason we eat salads and exercise regularly is not because we are craving the attention of the opposite sex but rather because we just happen to have the common sense to keep ourselves healthy.
We have good friends who are boys, but, no--sorry--they are not our boyfriends. Our lives are fine. No, we are not disgusted with ourselves; no, we don’t wish to be someone else; and no, it’s not inscribed in our heads that popularity is everything. But we do know who we are, we know where we come from, we know where we are going and we also know that the path we choose isn’t going to have drugs, violence and early pregnancies in it. If we know this, why doesn’t everybody?
Why is it that every move we make is labeled as a symptom of some sinister psychological disorder? The “badness” and “goodness” of people result from the choices they make. But is it just that a few bad choices stain us all? There is something that we all need to do: open our eyes and see through the fog, see the beautiful things that we are missing by letting ourselves be blinded by our stereotypes and our prejudices.
Lakshmi Gokanapudy
Torrance
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Studies that document female progress toward equality in male-dominated American society over the last 10 years provide encouraging occasions for celebration.
Recent studies that document the dysfunctional behavior of adolescent girls provide occasions for concern, attention and further reform.
Stabiner adds nothing constructive to this ongoing revolution by insisting that critics who investigate are at best moping about in the past among long- resolved issues of “self-esteem” or, at worst, trying to demonize these self-made heavenly creatures through the prism of sexist expectations.
In any case, Stabiner surprisingly fails to mention the girl trouble that is the most obvious impediment to success: pregnancy.
Jim Valentine
Woodland Hills
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Stabiner’s use of Marlborough School for research comparison is specious at best. I had the honor of being a guest art teacher/lecturer there within the most recent school year.
Not only are the students the richest of the rich, but the class size, the facilities and the teachers themselves surpass those of even some of the more elite colleges in the country.
The students are bright and well behaved but hardly fit to be objects of a study purporting to be a reliable inquiry into the motivations for behavior of today’s teenage women.
Robert Myers
Santa Monica