No Love Lost Over Canadian Pair’s Choice of Music

Where do I begin ...

to tell the story of ...

the end of civilization as we know it?

Like a mosquito to one of those backyard zapping devices, I was drawn to the Winter Olympic figure skating pairs finals Monday night. I sensed that we were on the edge of the apocalypse.

It wasn’t because a gold medal winning streak--either Soviets or Russians have finished first in pairs in each Olympics since 1964--was in jeopardy. As winning streaks go, that one doesn’t resonate in Los Angeles quite like the Lakers’ 33 consecutive victories or UCLA’s seven consecutive NCAA basketball titles.

No, ominous clouds were gathering over the Salt Lake Ice Center because of the favored Canadians’ choice of music for their freestyle program.

The Russians, with their classical upbringings, have over the years brought the best traditions of the Bolshoi and Kirov theaters to figure skating.

When the Protopopovs won the pairs in 1964 in Innsbruck, Austria, and ’68 in Grenoble, France, they skated to music such as “Meditations” from Jules Massenet’s opera “Thais.”

Natalia Mishkutenok and Artur Dmitriev won in 1992 in Albertville, France, to “Liebestraume.” Ekaterina Gordeeva and Sergei Grinkov, who won in 1988 with a program combining Chopin and Mendelssohn, used Beethoven’s “Moonlight Serenade” to win in 1994.

The Russian team of Elena Berezhnaya and Anton Sikharulidze, leading after Saturday night’s technical program, came full circle in the long program, skating to “Meditations.”

The Canadian pair of Jamie Sale and David Pelletier, second after the technical program but still considered the favorites by many, skated to the theme from “Love Story.”

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I am often reminded when I make reference to a cultural touchstone from my youth (“Easy Rider,” Boz Scaggs, “Harry O”) that not all of you were as aware as I was--or even alive--during the ‘60s and ‘70s.

So maybe you missed “Love Story,” the book, the movie and the song, the last of which actually was titled, “Where Do I Begin?”

As advertised by Bantam Books, Erich Segal’s novel is “the wonderful, tumultuous, heartfelt story of Oliver Barrett IV and Jenny Cavilleri--the story of a rich Harvard jock and a wisecracking Radcliffe music major who have nothing in common but love ... and everything else to share but time.”

Maybe. I didn’t read the book.

But I can tell you that the “All Movie Guide” is dead on in this appraisal of the 1970 film starring Ryan O’Neal and Ali McGraw:

“Despite financial travails (the pampered Oliver actually has to go to work!) the couple is blissfully happy ... until Jenny is diagnosed as having a disease that consigns the victim to an early death, but which leaves said victim looking like a million bucks even on the brink of eternity.”

As my wife can tell you, I tear up at least twice a night while watching television. “Touched by an Angel” gets to me every time. I even cry when Kenny dies in “South Park,” and that occurs at least once every episode.

I left the theater after seeing “Love Story” as dry-eyed as if I had been watching the evening news.

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The theme song, composed by Frenchman Francis Lai, was every bit as sappy as the movie, and you wouldn’t have heard a complaint from me if I had never heard it again. And then came the pairs final Monday night.

As they would say in the “South Park” movie, “Blame Canada.”

Sale and Pelletier used “Love Story” in 1999, mercifully ditched it and then were actually prodded by many to reprise it for their Olympic campaign. I guess there is no accounting for taste. One figure skating writer the other day referred to the program as “wildly popular,” which suggests that we haven’t come far as a society in 30 years.

I fear for the future. The tasteful Russians are on the wane in pairs figure skating. Sports authorities in the Soviet Union used to steer the best skaters into pairs and dance. Today, the skaters themselves make the decisions, and most of them, like Americans, prefer to compete in singles. Collectivism is out. Individualism is in.

Tamara Moskvina, the legendary pairs coach from St. Petersburg, Russia, has moved to New Jersey. She still coaches Berezhnaya and Sikharulidze there. But she also is coaching Americans--including Kyoko Ina and John Zimmerman, who entered Monday night’s competition in fifth place--and sees firsthand that standards

are not as high everywhere

in the sport as they were in

Russia.

After the efficient but less-than-sparkling performance of Berezhnaya and Sikharulidze in the technical program, Moskvina said: “Americans in such case would say, ‘Tremendous, beautiful, unbelievable.’ What else? ‘Amazing.’ We Russians, we say, ‘OK.’”

The standard is slipping for music too.

If the Canadians can become gold medal contenders with “Love Story,” what’s next?

“Feelings”?

“Mandy”?

Shame on the Canadians. Winning a medal doesn’t mean you never have to say you’re sorry.

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Randy Harvey can be reached at randy.harvey@latimes.com