Surf’s Up in Van Nuys; Taking a Pass on Bread With a Special Ingredient

The heat may have been stifling in some parts of Southern California, but at least there were those ocean breezes in Van Nuys. Or so I assumed after reading the Weather Channel’s Web site (see accompanying). But Joshua Rabinowitz of Van Nuys pointed out that the “tide” might have related to another body of water. Perhaps it “was referring to a predicted surge in outflow from the Tillman Water Reclamation Plant.”

And was that rain in the Santa Monica Mountains? Sort of. Cliff Dektar of North Hollywood reports that an artificial downpour fell for the filming of a scene of TV’s “Will & Grace” alongside the Franklin Canyon Reservoir.

There’s no such thing as real rain around here.

Word imperfect: Samuel and Catherine Maksimuk of Agua Dulce found a typo that made a loaf of split-top bread sound less than appetizing (see accompanying).

Type-cast: The down market for typewriters must be the reason, theorizes Jon Stanley of Westlake Village, that one hopeful seller offered to include a Spanish housekeeper in the deal (see accompanying).

What am I? John Anderson of Santa Maria noticed an air of mystery about a sweater he bought (see accompanying), leading him to ask: “If the material is unknown, how do they make more of them?”

Who am I? The media Web site ronfineman.com mentioned a couple of instances where substitute TV anchors inadvertently identified themselves on the air as the folks they were replacing.

Such snafus brought back memories for other broadcast folks. As a writer/producer, Emile Barrios of San Diego wrote a daily script for a “particularly dimwitted anchor that began, ‘Good Evening, I’m ... .’ followed by his name.”

Barrios fantasized about writing “Good Evening, I’m Donald Duck,” but settled on a shortened version: “Good evening, I’m ... “ (omitting the anchor’s name from the script). Barrios said that when the anchor came to that point, “there was an ‘uhhhh’ followed by three exquisite seconds before he could figure out who he was.”

Identity crises (cont.): Anchors don’t always misidentify themselves accidentally, wrote former radio broadcaster Frank Catalano of Seattle.

He remembered when Bob Beran, a fellow anchor at his station, was having an uncharacteristically bad day, stumbling over copy and experiencing various technical glitches.

When it came time to sign off, Beran declared, “I’m Frank Catalano, KMPS News.”

MiscelLAny: A colleague noted that the heightened security in the wake of 9/11 apparently prompted one of the skycap counters at Burbank Airport to post a warning that shows a red circle around the slashed-out word “Jokes.”

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Steve Garvey, I mean Harvey, can be reached at (800) LA-TIMES, ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A. 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.