A closer look reveals true love

Two words for Mark Miller: Take heart. And a sentence: You really can’t tell the ending from the beginning. (“Trying for a 10 on the Love Relationship Scale,” July 3).

Case in point: my current relationship. For the first five months, my feelings vacillated like crazy. First I thought ... hmmm, seems nice, minimally cute, but I think we’ll just end up good friends. For me, no spark, nada (different story for him, apparently, but I can only describe my experience).

My soul and heart had another agenda, while my ego, during the ensuing months of friendship and flirting and three-hour conversations, fought like crazy, “No, I don’t like him. I am not even the least bit attracted.” And to be honest, I wasn’t, until about three weeks ago.

Wild, huh? The slowest burn of the century. Unexpected, but unbelievably blessed now. If I had listened to my ego, I wouldn’t be writing you now; I would have read the article and agreed wholeheartedly. Believe me, I was a devoted believer of “If it ain’t there, it ain’t there.”

But now I know that appearances are sometimes deceiving -- not just the physical ones, but the concept-based ones that initially pop up, the first judgments and early-conceived notions. Tell Alfonso to be more patient and let you be in control for a while. I hear my back-seat drivers, but I don’t have to listen to them.

Lilian Manansala

Newbury Park