Adoption ‘Friends’

I shook my head and marveled at Suzy Evans’ laundry list of debilitating feelings she endured because of her inability to naturally conceive a child: sadness, jealousy, anger, loneliness, helplessness and depression to the point of considering suicide (“Infertility Feels Like a Punch, Not a Punch Line,” May 19).

My husband and I rejoiced to see adoption portrayed on “Friends” as a positive and exciting option, and not as Evans describes it, full of emotional, physical and financial heartache, because it isn’t. Rather than waste time focusing on our needs, our wants and what we deserved, we dove into the adoption process with the zeal that drives all good parents and concentrated on the child’s needs, the child’s wants and what the child deserves. Our daughter was home and legally adopted in under one year (typical of many international adoptions) and for approximately $20,000 (also typical), far less than the cost of years of unsuccessful fertility treatments.

We cannot understand why anyone would spend even five minutes thinking that unless one gives birth they are to remain childless. Thank you, “Friends,” for showing that the decision to adopt is not a last resort, but can lead to a beautiful experience, as beautiful as childbirth.

Susan Kayden

West Hollywood