Taking the Cyberspace High Road

As a psychologist who has explored with couples whether cyber-relationships can be considered infidelities, I want to commend C.J. Bahnsen on an excellent essay (“Ghost in the Machine,” Metropolis, Aug. 24). He describes, in a simple but well-nuanced story, some of the profound issues involved in these cyberspace intimacies.

Everyone in Bahnsen’s essay rose to the occasion: The husband who discovered his wife’s emotional e-mail entanglement with the journalist, yet welcomed the man to a family meal in his home. The wife whose rebuff was an affectionate hug goodbye. The journalist who, recognizing the seriousness of the “game,” bowed out, saddened but wiser. I will refer to this story in my work as an example of courage and growth and the happy ending that is possible when people take the high road.

Stella Resnick

President, Society for the Scientific Study of Sexuality / Western Region

Los Angeles