A whiff of masculinity, with a bracing hint of exhaust fumes
Women’s fragrances suggest billowing curtains, sea breezes, flowing lace, seductive midnight glances.
Guys, meanwhile, can smell like Hummers.
Yes, for the man who wants his bodily odor to denote a High Mobility Multipurpose Wheeled Vehicle originally designed for the Army, we have Hummer Eau de Toilette Spray -- as well as scents tied in with Jaguars, Corvettes, Ferraris and Orange County Chopper motorcycles.
“It is aspirational, just like any celebrity or designer fragrance,” said Mary Ellen Lapsansky, executive director of the New York-based Fragrance Foundation. “A lot of people can’t afford a Hummer or a Jaguar, but they can buy the fragrance. So it’s buying into the whole luxury thing.”
How does a Hummer smell?
Well, you’ve been behind one on the highway. How’s this: a robust bouquet of gasoline fumes with some burnt tar notes on top, accents of mud and oil and hints of grilled squirrel and toasted hazelnuts. (There’s always a hint of toasted hazelnuts -- or is that just cheese?)
But that’s not what you get when you spritz on the contents of that Hummer-shaped bottle. Here’s how the Hummer’s own materials describe it: “The Hummer adventure begins with a fresh and exhilarating burst of freshness comprised of green foliage, cardamom, thyme and peppercorns that capture the essence of the outdoors. These lively notes are then melded with a warm, rugged, masculine, adrenaline rush of leather, patchouli, amber and sandalwood. The smooth richness of tonka bean act[s] as the ‘axle’ that links and balances the fresh and warm notes, creating an olfactory sensation that can only be Hummer.”
Oh, so that’s the olfactory sensation that can only be Hummer. Funny, but when I wore the fragrance home, my wife just said, “Oh! You smell like a bad Saturday night date from 1989.”
I dabbed some on at work as well and harassed -- I mean, solicited opinions from -- some of my female colleagues. Adjectives they used: “mossy,” “flowery,” “subtle.”
“That’s Hummer?” one colleague reacted in shock when I revealed the scent’s identity. “It smells like Irish Spring soap.”
To take the sniff test to its logical extreme, I approached Donald Trump when he was at Marshall Field’s in Chicago recently to promote his new Donald Trump the Fragrance. He said he’d never heard of Hummer.
Fortunately, I just happened to have some spritzed on my wrist, so I held it daintily under his nose. After asking his bodyguard to let go of my arm, Trump sniffed and muttered dismissively, “It smells great.”
Tom Julian, trend analyst for the New York creative marketing agency Fallon Worldwide, said the idea behind these road scents is “the extension of these stylish brands entering worlds in unexpected ways.
“The new generation of sport utility vehicles are marketed in such a unique way that they can exist not only as a sport utility but as a brand that can live in other categories, like apparel and accessories.”
Hence we can wear Hummer -- but not Buick.
“You’re buying into a certain lifestyle when you buy the Hummer fragrance,” Lapsansky said. “A Buick, I don’t know.”
OK, but guess what? There is a Chevrolet men’s fragrance. Perfumania.com notes: “Chevrolet is classified as a refresh- ing, fruity fragrance.” Va va vrrrroooooom!
Chevrolet isn’t exactly a hot men’s product or even widely available, but most high-end fragrance shops and department stores stock Hummer, which was released this fall and almost immediately vaulted into the top-20 bestselling men’s fragrances, according to NPD Beauty.
