Another Tour of Anxiety for Troops’ Kin

The Wennerstrands folded up the banner that says, “Welcome Home, Derek.” Barbara Landgraf told her boss she didn’t need Monday off after all to paint her son’s room. Julie Dickerman canceled the surprise Las Vegas vacation she had booked for her and her husband.

Their soldiers weren’t coming home. Not now, anyway. And for the families of the 94th Military Police Company -- a New England Army Reserve unit whose tour of duty was extended in Iraq (for a second time) just hours before its scheduled departure for home -- it was time to hunker down and live with anxiety a while longer.

“I was crushed, devastated,” said Lynda Turcotte of Tyngsboro, Mass., whose fiance is a sergeant. “I’ve gone through serious depression. When grief is mixed with a bit of hope like this, the loss feels like death. I think back on the last year, and it’s of being out on my porch, looking at the stars and chain smoking. I’m a herbalist, fresh air and all that, and I’m chain smoking!”

“Reggie signed on the dotted line, so I know this is his job,” said Penny Littlefield of Oxford, Maine, whose daughter was born while her husband was in Iraq. “I’d never blame the military, but honestly, I don’t know if I’m coming or going. I try and stay positive, but I do a lot of crying.”

“I talked to Derek today,” said Bob Wennerstrand of Norwood, Mass. “He’s as worried how this affects us as how it affects him. I know the soldiers will suck it up and go do the mission, but their morale is low. They feel they’re getting jerked around. They’ve done their time, and I’d just like to say to the Pentagon, ‘Next time you’re thinking of a troop rotation, would you please bring the 94th home.’ ”

The 94th’s soldiers were among 20,000 troops extended in April because, with the upsurge of violence in Iraq, the Army has found itself spread thin. Of the Army’s 10 active-duty divisions, all or parts of nine are serving 12-month tours in the Middle East, or have recently returned home. Nearly 40% of the troops in the Iraq occupation are reservists or National Guardsmen -- the highest percentage of “weekend warriors” ever called to war.

The extension affected a wide range of soldiers: engineers from Utah, helicopter crews from Illinois, doctors from Massachusetts, transportation specialists from South Dakota.

It also raised questions about the appropriate length of combat tours. In Vietnam, tours lasted 13 months for Marines, 12 for others; in Korea, troops went home after six months at the start of the war but eventually were required to stay 16; in World War II, tours were for the “duration,” except for pilots who worked on a point system for combat missions flown.

“If our boys came home tomorrow, that wouldn’t bother me a bit,” said Skip Libby, a retired Portland firefighter with 34 years in the military and a son, Todd, in Iraq. “They did their mission. People say, ‘Well, there would be civil war if that happened.’ I don’t care. They’ve been having civil war over there forever.”

The 94th has suffered no fatalities in Iraq but has seen tough duty, operating from the Syrian border to Fallouja, a volatile, Sunni Muslim-dominated city west of Baghdad. Several members have been wounded, including Curtis Mills, a Portland postman who now walks with a cane. The unit is not involved in the scandal over military police who humiliated and abused Iraqi prisoners.

Families of the 94th’s soldiers hold diverse opinions -- on the war and the way the Bush administration has conducted it -- and go to lengths to avoid whining or attempting to speak for anyone other than themselves. But as casualties mount and comparisons are made between Iraq and Vietnam, the war is taking an emotional toll on the home front.

“We got married with just six days’ planning because Greg had been mobilized for Iraq,” said Dickerman of Foxboro, Mass., whose husband is with the 94th. “I spent six days in tears. Don’t get me wrong. The wedding was beautiful. All our best friends were there. But a shadow hung over us: the war.”

“Matt came home for two weeks’ leave, and I thought it would be tough knowing he had to go back,” said Landgraf of Durham, N.H. “But it was wonderful. For 15 days I could see my child asleep in his bed and not have to worry.

“I’ve had to quit my job of 18 years because I can’t stand stress any longer. Whether it’s because of the war and the extension, I don’t know. I just know the military shouldn’t have told our soldiers, twice, they were coming home and not kept their word,” she said.

With the MPs of the 94th having served in Bosnia-Herzegovina in 2000 and been on active duty for 17 months in the Iraq occupation, relatives said their soldiers were tired and operating on short fuses.

In part, they attribute the stress to war weariness, the increased violence, the inability to tell friend from foe and what they cite as inadequate equipment: thin-skinned Humvees, third-generation communications gear and, in the early combat stages at least, outdated body armor. Barbara Landgraf’s son, Spc. Matthew Landgraf, spent $500 and brought his own Kevlar vest to Iraq.

The families are of two minds in dealing with the unit’s second extension. One group has sought media attention, has spoken with Maine’s U.S. senators and wants a meeting at the Pentagon to raise concerns about what they consider antiquated equipment and an inappropriately long tour of duty for reservists, particularly since some active-duty units have rotated home with less time in the field.

“I’ll tell you Scott’s exact words: ‘We’re being treated as second-class citizens,’ ” said Nancy Durst, one of the activists, referring to her husband, a staff sergeant. “Your head goes in dark, ugly places at times like this. I can feel the anger oozing out of me, but I don’t know what to do with it or who to blame.”

The second group believes that family complaints make the soldiers seem to be crybabies. “Put a lid on it, people,” the parents of a sergeant e-mailed families. “Your actions are giving our brave soldiers a bad name.... Like everyone else, we were shocked and quite upset by this second extension and want our son home -- but that’s the military. We’re back on our feet and ready for the next round. Get over it, and use your energies to do something positive.”

Many families look for positives to ease the burden of war. “I’ve found a few,” Julie Dickerman said. “How many people have a boxful of letters from a loved one? People don’t even write letters anymore. But I’ve got every letter Greg ever wrote, from boot camp, Bosnia, Iraq. That’s a positive. And it’s nice to know I’m strong enough to deal with things like this on my own.”

She paused for a moment, then added, “I don’t know. I just think everyone’s tired.”