Just Say ‘No’
In Hollywood, the magic word rarely said out loud yet always yearned for is quite simple. The dream for any project, role or script is to get to that tiny utterance: the elusive “yes.”
So it should follow that just saying “no” would be quite easy.
But no.
Curiously, despite the preponderance of “no” in the industry, the word itself is rarely blurted out.
To actually say that conclusive, deal-breaking word is seen as savage, or at least deeply foolish in a town unironically obsessed with “relationships.”
These recent times of confusion and uncertainty wrought by the writers strike and its aftershocks have only added to the industry’s reliance on passive-aggressive naysaying. With so many things on a wait-and-see basis--from an outcome of the strike itself to awards shows to television’s pilot season--and with information changing moment to moment, the safest policy has been to eschew commitment.
Such times call for creative measures, for fresh new ways to say “No.” Blame the strike (even when the strike isn’t to blame or after it’s been settled). One manager confesses that instead of telling a writer he didn’t like the writer’s script, he blamed the “pre-strike environment” for why he didn’t offer it to studios. “The truth is, if something is good, it can sell the day before a strike or on Christmas Eve,” the manager says. “It was just an excuse.”
Make it about you. Let’s face it, communicating that something--a project, an idea, a person--might be subpar is not unlike breaking off a romantic relationship and calls for the same blurry language. Phrases such as “It’s not working for me” or “We’re not connecting somehow” get the message across in a quasi good-hearted way. To reinforce that you’re not a total jerk, throw in Hollywood’s standard feel-good affirmation: “But I really love your work.”
Reschedule. And then reschedule again. Whether it’s a dreaded lunch or drinks meeting, there’s no need to admit you find the other guy either useless to your career or narcolepsy-inducing. Simply reschedule! By the ninth date change to early next year, he’s bound to get the message.
Remain silent. Why expend negative energy breaking bad news when saying nothing at all is much more Zen? “The unreturned e-mail is just heartbreaking,” says TV writer-producer Joel Madison (“Undeclared”). “You really don’t know if they maybe didn’t get” the message. Silence also comes in handy for network executives after they’ve axed a show. “They leave you hanging until the last second,” Madison says. “They don’t really tell you you’re canceled; they just never pick you up. All of these deadlines kind of expire, and they don’t ever say anything.”
Pass the buck. There’s no need to put your neck on the line when there are many superiors (everyone with a VP in their title or, even better, CEO) who get paid to have the last word. Just say Mr. Big would never go for it.
In person, remain all smiles. It’s never a good idea to convey “your idea stinks” face to face. Or as George Heller, a manager at Foursight Entertainment, more politely puts it: “No one ever passes in a room.You can usually tell if they don’t like something, but they would never say ‘No,’” Heller says. “They say, ‘Let us think about it.’”
When all is said and done, the best course might be to simply go for it. Just put your lips together and say “No.”