Where’s Manny?

The American Psychiatric Assn. has just announced a new test for determining a person’s sanity. You ask them if they would accept $25 million for taking a stick and hitting a thrown ball. If they say no, they are determined to be severely brain-challenged. If they say yes, you know they have some intellectual capacity and can move forward in the real world.

Bob Aronoff

Pasadena

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Hey, Dodgers: Manny and his horrible agent turned you down again. How many times are you going to ask them to dance before you get the picture? He’s just not that into you!

I have a simple suggestion. Take half the $25 million you just tried to give Ramirez and send it to the California education fund. This would help to make up some of the state education funding shortfall in California for the next two years. Heck, I bet the governor would even name a school or two after you guys. Ned Colletti Middle School, Frank McCourt High, Dodgers Elementary! Sounds fantastic to me!

Joshua Levine

Castaic Elementary School

(soon to be Dodgers Elementary)

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We are now aware that while managing the Dodgers last season, Joe Torre was still thinking about the Yankees. Fortunately for Joe, Manny afforded him the opportunity to do that. We can only hope that with his cathartic endeavor behind him, Joe can begin to concentrate on the job he is being paid to do with what appears to be an even less talented team than he observed last year.

Rich Sperber

Woodland Hills